So It Is

As I sit here, watching from some place familiar, yet hauntingly destitute, I ponder several questions. Envy is a sin, but isn't loneliness just as sinful? I pray to a God I can't see, but know exists, but my faith hides in darkened corners of pain. She's so young they say. Her smile should be true. But how can it when nothing inside her urges her to be happy? My Lord, when will it end? It's so tiring to ache this much. A soulmate, a companion in life, is all I ask for. Is that too much? Years of asking the same question, I guess it's safe to conclude: so it is.