Ash. The Best Hero. Ever.
"Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up. You see this. This... is my boomstick!".
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13 words
Mattydev
I've got a flannel to was my face, when it gets mucky I feel disgraced, do you like Horlicks, do you like chips, I've got a hundred pairs of lips.
23
Stories
75
Followers
Stories by @Mattydev (23)
Maybe?
Ok within the past month or two my life has taken a turn for the worse. I lost my job, my love interest fucked me over and I got ruined by the banks taking money I didn't have.
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166 words
That Feeling.
When your father turns around to you and tells you "son, i am so very proud of you right now" those words stick by you for life. Never forget them, they are true love and inspiration..
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36 words
We'll Go To Infinity
Come with me, come with me, we'll travel to infinity, I'll always be there oh ohh my future love, I'll always be there for you. My future love. - The Klaxons, Gravitys rainbow..
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33 words
Don't You Hate...
... That immediate feeling once you wake up. You know the one that says "c'mon get up.
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65 words
Greg Davies
I've just watched his DVD and I can't honestly believe I've ever laughed so hard in my life. It's so funny. I'm in literal hysterics at this.
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42 words
Is It Me..
... Or is everyone suddenly getting a fuck-tonne more followers. :').
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11 words
Pink Triangle.
When I'm stable long enough, I start to look around for love, see a sweet in floral print.
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87 words
Talking To Ghosts
Me and my roommate have decided to each night attempt to contact the dead, just to see what is there, if they want to talk.
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56 words
Ghost Walks!
After watching a bunch of films about ghosts and evil monsters my housemate and I have decided to take a wander around the graveyard outside our house... WooooooOOOOOoooohhhh.
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34 words
Flannel. It's Not A Real Word.
I've got a flannel to wash my face, When it gets mucky I feel disgraced, Do you like horlicks do you like chips. I've got a hundred pairs of lips..
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30 words
Something You Wouldn't Hear On A Breakfast Show.
Good morning and welcome to Radio Tourettes you shit monkeys. - Frankie Boyle.
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13 words
Wise Words
If you can't be a shining example, be a horrible warning. - Stephen Fry, QI..
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15 words
On A Lighter Note...
I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.
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53 words
Loneliness + Friend-Zoning
I'm a very patient man, I have taken my time in life and had a few short lived relationships, don't get me wrong during them I was happy. But the space in-between them killed me.
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263 words
Live!
Live for today. For tomorrow is promised to no-one..
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9 words
In The Gutter
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars - Oscar Wilde..
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18 words
In Life There Is One Love
We are all born equals kicking and screaming. No-one is better than you, we all bleed the same and all share the same oxygen and planet. We have to live as equals to have peace.
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69 words
Power And Grace.
Sometimes the people with the most power lack the most grace. - Petyr Baelish, Game of Thrones..
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17 words
Beauty
Beauty is everywhere you go, from the morning dew on the grass first thing in the morning to the setting of the sun in the evening. From the most malformed people to the skinniest model.
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74 words
What A Partner Should Be.
A wise friend of mine once said to me: A partner is not someone who should make your life awesome. Your life should be awesome anyway, a partner should just be a cool addition to your life..
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37 words
Time And Love
Upon taking time to fall in love you waste time falling in love with someone else. Then the person you wanted to fall in love with has already fallen in love with another.
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67 words
Einstein Once Said:
There are only two things that are infinite; The Universe and Human Stupidity. And I'm not too sure about the former..
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21 words