Patchwork Sky

"We shouldn't be here!" I tried to protest, yet my voice was swallowed by giggles. You just smiled, and tugged on my hand to help me through the gaping hole in the iron fence. We climbed the rocky slope, laughing the whole way up, and my mind spun with the possibilities of the surprise you promised.

The clouds hung low in the sky, thick and heavy with the promise of rain. Looking up, I saw how the sky was coloured in purples and reds, like a painter had splattered the world in multicolours. I tried to think of the proper words to describe it, and all that came to mind was a patchwork sky. The sun was just setting, dipping to rest below the horizon, and as it cast warm glows across the hills surrounding us, I was filled with a sense of pure joy.

I looked across at you, finding you watching me, a smile tugging on your lips. The setting sun cast glimmers of light over your face, and I was struck by how beautiful you were. Like always, you seemed to read my mind.
"There'll be time to admire my infinite gorgeousness later," you said in a cocky tone, pulling me further up the hill, "but right now there's something I want you to see."

I could hear the importance of this moment in your voice, and so faithfully followed you upwards. The further we climbed, the thicker the air became, and a smell of smoke drifted with the breeze and reached me. It travelled through my nose to tickle the back of my throat, and I fought the urge to cough.
"Can you smell that?" I asked worriedly, my voice thick from trying to breathe normally.
"Don't worry," you said assuredly, "the smell just means we're getting close."

We reached the peak of the hill, and looking over the other side, I was filled with a sense of horror. The vast forest that stretched far across the other side of the hill was burning. Huge, white tipped flames licked the land dry, turning trees to ashen lumps before jumping upwards towards the sky. Half the forest was already destroyed, black dust swirling in the wind as the fire raged on.

I don't know how long I stood there, silently, unable to move, frozen by the devastating sight in front of me, but suddenly I realised you were speaking.
"It's a controlled fire," you said, and I was chilled by the emotionless tone to your voice, "the Digicorp Company started it to clear the land so they could build their new business complex. I overheard my dad talking about it yesterday. He said there was some controversy about building the complex because the forest was part of a nature reserve or something stupid like that, so Digicorp just sealed off the area and started burning, before anyone had time to do anything about it. Look, love, it's the future. Isn't it wonderful?"

I don't know how to respond. The very idea of destroying a nature reserve for the sake of a business complex repulsed me, yet even though this new side of you scared me, I still felt the need for your approval.
"What about the animals?" I asked timidly, "and the plants and everything? They just destroyed it all?"
"Exactly," you said smiling, mistaking my quietness for amazement, "no one really cared about that stuff anyway. Well, ok, I guess some people did, but they were just tree huggers and the like, and who cares what they think?"

"Is this a bad time to mention that I'm a member of both the Ecological Society and Wildlife Activists?" I snapped, my patience cutting short. I felt ready to kick you when you laughed.
"You've got to be kidding me! Seriously, you're joking right?"
"No I'm not!" I spoke through gritted teeth.
You looked at me curiously, finally realising I was serious.
"God, love, what were you thinking? Why the hell would you want to join THOSE groups?" You asked with one eyebrow raised, and I once again fought the growing urge to kick you.

"I was THINKING that all wildlife should be preserved and that it's wrong to destroy the natural world for the sake of materialistic possessions. I thought you agreed with me!"
Your eyes were wide, an you looked completely shocked. You stood silent for a moment, contemplating what to say next. I thought, I hoped, you would begin to show a little respect for my beliefs, yet as you spoke, my faith in you shattered.
You suddenly grinned, and said, "did those groups drug you or something?"
You laughed cruelly and continued,
"Seriously love, this isn't you. I thought you would see the beauty in this. I mean, you are an artist; I thought you'd look at the fire and get lost in the colours or something artsy like that. I mean, what is this?"
As you spoke, your voice had started to rise, and now you were almost yelling at me.

"This is me!" I yelled back, "I thought you'd appreciate me being honest with you!"
"Well you thought wrong!" You snarled, turning from me, a look of fury in your eyes. I couldn't believe this was you; you had never spoken like this before.
"You know what," I said quietly, my mind made up, "I'm done."
"What do you mean, you're done? You're LEAVING me?!"
"Yeah, I am."

And I left you there, hurt and speechless in the hill, a dark silhouette against a background of orange and red, alone. I walked quickly down the hill, waiting to hear your footsteps behind me, hoping for you to call me back and apologise, and go back to being the boy I knew, the boy I loved. But all I heard was silence. I climbed back through the gap in the fence and forced myself not to look back.

As I set off for home, I looked up into the sky that had filled me with joy, with hope, with promise, yet now only fills me with regret. I wish I could turn back and tell you I'm sorry, but I know I have to stay true to myself, and that means I can't apologise for what I believe in. I know that tonight my dreams will be haunted by you, by the memories we've shared. I thought you were perfect, I thought I would spend my life with you. You were beautiful, but I know now that even the most beautiful of roses have thorns, and I once thought I loved you, but now, you're like poison to me.

My feet drag over the ground, my steps slowing until I come to a stop, and I gaze upwards. A flock of birds soar over my head, heading south for the winter, and they stand out amongst the clouds. Their dark colourings are like a splash of night across the sun, a contrast, against the colour filled sky.

I start to walk again, slowly, as the patchwork sky leads me home.