Teenagers!!

You all must of heard before, the term "Can't do right, for doing wrong".
It's a universal term, that has been around for ages.
What you probably didn't know is, this term was forged a millennia ago, in prophesy of my coming!
You see, when it comes to parenting my oldest child, 14 (I've already acknowledged that's a weird name for a child), I'm always the bad guy!

All 14 sees, is his awful evil dad telling him to do his homework. Clean his room. Clean his teeth. Heck, just clean himself (Teenagers stink!!).

I do tend to have a go at him quite a lot. But not without reason...
14 can be given the most strictest of instructions, in so much detail it is pain-staking to go through. and still get things wrong.
A perfect example of this occurred just this week...

I'm applying for my first British passport, as I need to go to Shanghai with work. A friend of mine is a personal licence holder and was notarising my passport photos.
14 was on his way to scouts, where my friend is a leader. So I gave the photo to him and explicitly told him: "I need you to fetch this back with you, it is so important I get this sent off tomorrow as I'm working to a deadline. I need the passport sorted before I can get my Chinese visa. DO NOT COME BACK WITHOUT IT!!".
I reckon you can guess what happened next?
I blew my top a little, explained his mistake and left it at that.

Then this morning I notice some money had gone missing from my wallet.
I called 14 on his mobile, explained to him that he was the only person who could of possibly been in my wallet ("her in-doors" was still in bed), so he should get his arse home to put the cash back.
After swearing he did not take anything, and even offering to be searched, I told him to head home with the money.
I think you can guess what happened next?
I explained that if he had asked, he would of got the cash, and sent him off to school.
He then proceeded to text his Mum, telling her he hates me and doesn't want to live with us any more (He has mentioned on a number of occasions, that he does not want to be near me and doesn't care what I think).

I come out the other end of this one in the wrong??

So it seems trying to keep my Son clean, hygienic, smart and honest... I cannot do right, for doing wrong!