baldymemike

I had a shaving accident. I asked my wife not to use her razor on her legs and she punched me in the face.

I Had A Shaving Accident • Opuss № I

Gollum was the ideal best man until he was asked to handover the ring

Gollum Was The Ideal Best Man • Opuss № I

I'm so bad at sex my wife sent me on a clitoris awareness course. I didn't go. Obviously I couldn't find the venue

I'm So Bad At Sex • Opuss № I

The Perfects fill their car again. Rucksacks and walking boots, pocket maps and waterproofs. Photos Facebooked like safari trophies. After a Sunday abseiling down The Matterhorn they return to rustle up a Mongolian banquet or two. "It…

A Poem Called Outside My Window • Opuss № I