3 June 2012
he asks me if I am okay, and I say yes. and he knows I am lying so he asks if I am okay enough to manage till when he can reach me, and I say.. yes. I should say I don't know. I should say, I'm having trouble existing. but I don't. and he says I'm only a phone call away if you need me and I know, but there is no way for him to hold me through a phone. and he blows kisses and says, that is the sound of my kiss. and he stays quiet for a second whilst I take a shaky breath, and then says, I don't know if you could feel that but that was my love. and I fall apart inside. it causes no good to have him away. I am clinging on tightly but like nights when all you can hear is rain, the words arnt forthcoming. he has to go now. tells me of his love. I keep my voice level somehow whilst saying goodbyes. there is a cold beep, and it's just the wind outside and the soft blinking of rain on the edges of my universe.
nights like this • Opuss № I