Turns out that it's impossible to write anything here which doesn't make you feel like a dick after a day.
Starting to maybe put things together here are we?” Felix had to take a long, slow breath to stop himself from vomiting over the desk.
She got up and walked over to the kitchen where she collected three large wine glasses which she brought back over to the glass coffee table.
15. The day had been mad, not one second’s rest for anyone who had been designated a job for tonight’s party.
14. Holly The crematorium is a large, fairly nondescript, block of concrete which sits in a fair sized park compound with weaving concrete paths through blandly floral shrubberies.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, I slide it out and answer, “Hey baby, where are you?” “Fee, don’t call me baby please, I’m a woman not a baby,” comes back Ali’s voice from the phone.
13. Felix It would be nearly impossible to overstate the enormity of the list of things which I have to do today.
increasingly aware that this peaceful time is running out and that if I want to get out of here without an argument I’m going to have to be quick.
12. Holly It’s all work work work, I don’t do anything else anymore.
“For God’s sake do you really need to ask.
11. Felix It’s the morning after but I’m half stuck in a nostalgic reverie, uncertain of whether or not I’m awake or dreaming. I’m lying in the centre of my bed, on top of the covers.
10. Holly “Mum, I’m going to be twenty next year, I’m old enough to be making my own decisions.” I explain to her knowing it’s not going to help.
not only would he tell me what a fuck-up I am, he’d also tell me all about whatever he was doing which kept him a bigger fuck-up than me, but no phone means no Julian and that means I’ve got to get...
9. Felix Caleb follows me through the bar like the good little lap dog that I’ve trained him to be.
the bar was almost empty now with only the few people for whom a work schedule was not an issue remaining.
8. Felix and Holly both woke up at the same time that morning, one unaware of their biological ties and the other unaware of how to inform him of them.
she can go fuck herself. I walk out of the door and quickly go downstairs, I take off my coat and throw it on the sofa, even though it’s cold outside I’d rather feel it than ignore it right now.
7. Felix The night of Lola’s school play has come, I’ve spent most of the evening trying to block out all the goings on around me by watching mindless drivel on the television, it’s failed.
6.
I’m free, I’m clear, and once again, I got away with it.
5. Felix I can hear water. The cool on my face feels like I’m lying on a hard wet beach, I can hear the water swilling around nearby. In the distance I can hear a child’s voice.
I turn my head to him without taking it away from the wall, “I don’t know Cal, I’m just tired, it drains me working in there.
4. Holly I’m at work again, it feels like I’m always at work recently, but for once tonight has been going quickly because we’re packed to the rafters.
trying to call up his dad and girlfriend to bid them a teary farewell.” He points an angry finger at Juian. “You fucking degenerate.
3. Felix I’m outside, it’s dark now and very cold, as I exhale a long cloud escapes from my mouth but a cigarette isn’t the culprit it’s just that fucking cold and God knows why I’m out here.
2. Holly Working for Felix is similar, I feel, to working as a whore.
Caleb to let him know I won’t be in tomorrow, then it’s off to bed for hopefully a calm, uninterrupted sleep for my usual unhealthy four or five hours respite..
1.Felix An odd dichotomy exists in my life between love and happiness.