40 yr old who knows that a laugh or two a day is the best medicine you'll ever need!
A group of primary school infants, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to Cheltenham races to see and learn about thoroughbred horses.
An Irish farmer named Seamus had an accident with a lorry, and was suing the lorry company. In court their hot-shot solicitor was questioning Seamus.
A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, But they only know to say one thing.' 'What do they say?' the priest asked.
A Geordie golfer and his wife walked into a dentist's office. The Geordie said to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one hell of a hurry.
Patton staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.
Two businessmen in the centre of London were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop. As yet, the shop wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up.
The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise.
Bloke calls a company and orders their 5 day - 5kg weight loss program.
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said,"I'd like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world...
A bloke picks up a fat girl and takes her home. They strip off and get into bed. He climbs on top and after a couple of minutes says "Do you mind if I turn off the light?" The girl asks "Why.