5 June 2012
In a dark, little corner downtown
Seven shady figures gathered round,
Each as deadly as the next,
Each trying to be the baddest.
Gluttony decided to show off best
By the spectrum of forms he could manifest.
He gleefully gave his take
On being bad, his double chin all a-shake.
'Six shapes are the ones I can take
And by excessiveness I can make
You all obese by 2050
Or something along those lines, thou who art not thrifty.
Even better, while I kill everyone
From CHD, strokes oh what fun!
I'm killing off people in the third world too
Because you fatties out west eat all of the food.'
His cousin Greed interrupted his flow.
'That's nothing I put on a far badder show.
You only make the gap between the two worlds
Greater with shortage of food, young sir.
That is tame, my evil tale
Is of excessive consumption on a grander scale.
I kill and cull while the poverty gap
Grows larger and larger, that is that.
I put on a magnificent show
Of people in rags at the feet of those in gold,
Paupers begging by the throne of a prince
For some form of salvation which he won't give since
My claws are in him, poison seeps in.
I'm superior to you, little cousin.'
A blue, old dear got up from her seat
With a bag full of knitting and some boiled sweets.
'I only wish I was like you,
Evil and efficient, bad through and through,'
Envy sighed, 'All I can manage
Is a few murders and some criminal damage.
I prefer to get a blue rinse and a nice night at home
Watching Countryfile with my terrier, Ramone.
I don't really know why I'm here, to be fair
I think I'll pop off, so long my dears.'
The Master of the Damned came sauntering past
Looking them up and down from first to last.
'Everyone knows that Pride, I,
Am the incarnation of evil, once exalted on high
As an angel. I was proud and challenged God's divine role,
I wanted to have it for my own.
Now look at me, rotten, from head to toe
Tormenting the dead in my pit down below.'
A slow, old thing, Sloth, with whiskers and beard
Emerged sluggishly from the shadows, yawning and queer.
'I think I'm the worst in the land,
I make all so lazy that the common man
Will destroy himself as he can't be arsed
To get up off his bum for anything, such a farce.'
And, considering his sloth-like ways,
He sat back down, that was all he said.
'Oh, be at peace you old fogey before I do you in!'
Screamed Tim Wrath, creating such a din.
'We all know I'm the worst by far,
I'm the Father of Skirmish and War.
My pure rage can tear nations apart
And kill millions, scarring countries and hearts.
If any dare challenge they may be up for a fight
Because I'll tear them down with all my might.'
There was uproar in Evil's Cabinet Room
Until a lady in scarlet shone forth from the gloom
All the men turned and began to drool
While Envy took leave, the silly old fool.
'Come now, boys, clearly you must
Know the downfall of man is me, Lust.
You eye me up and down in my skin-tight dress,
Showing some leg, eager to impress,
I whisper sweet nothing's in your ear
So you'll do anything for me, dears.
You know I hold you all in my palm,
So you may as well crown me and call me ma'am.'
She flashed her white smile, ran her red tipped nails, the bait,
Down Wrath's cheek making him hyperventilate.
Gluttony got down on his hands and knees
While Lust was escorted by Pride and Greed
To her throne there to be crowned
As the biggest, baddest Cardinal Sin in town.
The Seven Sin Summit • Opuss № I