9 June 2012
Chapter 8
He walked down to the sand. I tried to figure him out. He was nice, good kisser and somehow he cared about me.
The sand was clean. Our town made sure it was. People liked the beach and many swimmers liked to swim here. We walked in silence. He looked at the sky and at the water. He seemed shy.. No he seemed scared.
" what are you thinking about?". His question made me jump. " oh.. About you, actually. I need to know things". He looked at me with those eyes. They looked at me and then he said. " you will know everything when time is right". " exactly when? When john asks you or when he makes you answer?". " that's funny. I thought you will understand wh-" " no I don't! You tell me a never b and I am getting tiered of you kissing me, telling me I will know when time is right. I want to know, if you didn't want me to know why did you bring me here or even talked to me?" I was angry yes, but not at him. I was angry with myself, I stood there with those feelings and instead of telling him I liked him I got angry. " if I tell you.. You will never be the same. You will look at me differently and your life will change. And I am here because I love you. I have always been in love with you and I will not stop loving you".
I closed my eyes took a deep breath. When I opened my eyes he was walking to the car. I ran after him. Not fast, but not too slow either. " wait!". My voice was so low. I was shocked and he was leaving, no one ever told me that.
" listen, I want to tell you something" I was behind him. The wind blew and his perfume made me thinking of him topless. I never thought of boys that way but suddenly I did.
" I don't want to talk. Can we just go?" he was calm. But how? " I love you. Oh, I love you so much. I don't know why, but I do" I said it fast, wondering if he will turn and smile, maybe hug me. " I know..". That was his only answer. I walked around him and stood in front of him. I cried, I don't know why, but I did.
He said what I wanted him to say. Those sweet words and hugs, a kiss on my forehead. Then with all the answers in my head we stepped back in the car and drove back.
I couldn't sleep. My mind thought of him. I wanted him here. I wanted him to tell me things. But he didn't. My room was dark. But I heard a noise from a corner. I wanted to turn the lights on, but I knew it was nothing. " psst.. " what was that? Was it a thief? I had a baseball bat here. It was mine. I liked to play when I was younger so I kept it as memory. " it's me, James" what? How? Why? " don't turn the lights on. Please I feel bad. I want to apologize for everything, I wish we could start over." He spoke in a calm, beautiful voice. He sat on my bed I sat up wondering how I looked like. " I don't care.. I love you. I can't live without you. It's crazy but you are a part of me and my life".
He answered me with a kiss. I forgot about the world. The fact I had s boy kissing me in my bed in the dark. The questions I wanted to ask him one of them was how he got in here.
We kissed and it felt right. He didn't stop until I pulled away. Then I saw his face. The moon light finally got in my room. He was smiling. And I think I was smiling too.
If I Saw You Earlier • Opuss № I