10 June 2012
I don't want to sound conceited, but I really am the best, When it comes to cats and kittens, I am better than the rest.
All it takes from me is a chch, or a squeak through pursed lips, And all the kitties come running from their hunting or kips.
They purr round my legs, lick my hands with rough tongues, Let me tickle their tummies, be them old or young.
At 7 in the morn, as to the bus stop I travel, I hear 8 little kitty paws, crunching on gravel.
Then into the Tarmac, I hear a meow or two, and a purr, I scratch behind their ears, jog to the bus stop, and they follow me there.
The bus comes at ten past, I say goodbye to the cats, Tell them to "have fun, catch a few rats.
Gorge on their insides but leave some for me!" When I get home from school, what do I see?
I see two content kitties, wide-eyed in the big hedge, And a rat on my doorstep, and a crow on the window ledge.
They aren't legally mine, they're someone else's, see, But in their intelligent cat brains, they belong to me.
Wherever I go, if there's a cat there, I call it to me and make it purr.
They call me "The Cat Whisperer" • Opuss № I