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Joke from a book on Jon something or other's writing inspiration A man with no arms wanted to ring the church bells. "You can't ring a bell. You have no arms!" The priest exclaimed.
Arth The Garth. Who liked to laugh. Thought it was funny when sat in the bath. Said the bubbles got big when he done a fart. He liked to sniff, that Arth The Garth. Ray The Skate. Who liked to taste.
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To celebrate pi day, which is coming on March 14 (pi is around 3.14). ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~. We are all out of sugar. And our apples are gone. Our cinnamon is missing. And the flour tastes all wrong.
Step inside to wonderland Enchant your mind, unleash your hand. Cunningly craft a meeting in draft, Rupture your senses with a few taut tenses.
#acrostic Transcendental claptrap. What a load of bull. I'm sorry, but I've had enough, I'm Nobody's fool. Forget this 'soulmate' nonsense. Let's all get one thing clear. Alpha this. Omega that?.
One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other.
Sir Isaac Newton once said, 'Who the bloody hell threw that?' He also said, 'For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.' It's pretty quiet. The acrostic word is Melancholy.
#acrostic Basingstoke. What an Absolute dump. Full of Slobs, with no points of Interest, and Nothing to do.
I love I do to rhyme it's true. There's nothing that I'd rather do. Not rather would I like to swim. Not watch tv, I'd rather sing. Songs that rhyme I love the most. I love the way a chorus goes.
#weeklyopusschallenge His purple face gasps for air, The evil rope won't let him. Choking, he struggles but fails, The man's fate looks deathly grim.
Something Said it doeSn't ever Slip Cause my Cranium it Contains seCrets How the wHole eartH is Here below Only no One learns, i hOpe they knOw Once i knOw I'll try tO share the gOld Life is a Large...
Acrostics acrostics everywhere. Colorful bright they are. Roses in the dark. One for those so close and far. Sinful not to display. The greatest works of art. Ignite inspirations flame.
I apple Thursdays, but today. I don't feel apple impeached, in. Fact the opposite; I feel a mango. In places, as though I have a date. With destiny today, my pear of feet.
The missus likes to make a name. From her registration plate. Last one up was Diddikoi. You've been told of that ones fate. They've been varied, often strange. Sometimes easy, like FooFoo.
King Assad is offering another all inclusive holiday in Syria. All you have to do is sort his balls out for him. He wants to know which is the odd one out. His decision is final.
A man walks into a bar and orders ten pints of lager and then a further 12 vodka chases. The barman then watches, amazed, as the man downs them one after the other.
Can you spot the 2 deliberate mistakes . The winner will get a 1 week beach holiday for 2 in Syria:- Accommodation is paid for you just have to buy your own flights.
Following some recent research I thought some of you writers might appreciate a brief interlude especially you guys who write about lost love, pain and depression.
#acrostic. Surreptitious in my post. Compunctious in my boast. Rambunctious in leisure Unpretentious by nature. Mischievous by any measure. Propitious full of grace. Torturous in your face.
I make my _state meant_for each situation I partake in All my literature I _create Ted_ in tow we only know one directional flow A true _gentle_man_will have the hands A real _girl_friend_will...
I tried my hand at some Russian Reversal jokes, I hope you like them. - In the UK you find Wally. In Soviet Russia, Wally finds YOU. - In Soviet Russia, meme knows YOU. - In America you follow laws.
R E S I G N. E B U N D A N T*. S U N P T O I E UC. I N I M. G D P O E.
Repugnant Rapscallion youR Eluding yestErdays namE So shocking iS your stresS I'm turning In my grave, I Gotta escape Get guardinG Newer days, Never has aN Apprentice made so many mistakes I think...