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Showing stories tagged with #workplace-humor Clear filter
Yesterday I was very stressed Too much work and not enough rest. The pressure was really very bad I think it sent me slightly mad.
#stupidthingspeoplesay Back in August '99 I was talking to someone at work about the solar eclipse that would take place the following day when the boss's son (Paul) decided to join in the...
#acrostic *swearing will follow shortly (R)eally Mr Sugar, your firing me.
Mathematics: This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 years experience. (My great uncle and his wife). It has an indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
There's a fella at work That I write about Eighteen feet tall And a great noisy lout Most of the time He's an absolute dick Completely unfunny And boring.
My little motor. Has served me well. Even though my street. Was icy as hell. Made it to work. Through all the snow. There'll be absentees. Today, I know. They all live real close. And I'm miles away.
#aaaaaarrrrrggghhhh!!. I miss my morning Opuss tea When Eddie's not in town But things have gone from bad to worse They've closed the canteen down.
#slippedontheicelikeatwat. My warm winter coat is not enough Neighbours dog was too cold to woof.
Here we go again. In with the new. Getting ready for work. And there's nothing I can do. I've got to train a student. My bed is calling me. I don't want work today. But if it is good then I'll see.
Sitting here staring at a computer screen My job isn't IT but you couldn't tell from surveying the scene, I sit and print your photos all day long Just hoping to see a women in a thong.
Sorry, only one in the office today so far & I can already hear the following conversation before it happens.
Another week another dollar, well... less childminders fees. My disorganisation continues now the other half is home , one more body to chase out the house.
#minirant Just been called a 'responsible person', though I'm not sure what that means Coming from the powers that be it won't amount to a hill of beans If you're saying I do a good job, that's what...
He came down to call me To get me out of bed I called back politely But I meant not what I said. 'Im fucking up already. Damnit bloody shit. Can I have five minutes please You good-for-nothing twit.
#adventchallenge #gifts *this is true and has happened several times to me. So secret Santa gift to buy Can only spend a fiver No easy task but ill try.
#adventchallenge My gift is only small but it'll mean so much To those who are hard at it, and cursed to work as such It's for when you need it most, when your body's tired and achin' And it'll...
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.
Looks like it'll be one of those days When I actually have to earn my pay Always the way, nightshift in the room You no pay attention, machine go BOOM No point grassing or giving up names But you get...
Raining. A nasty day. But yes, it's creepy in a way. I go into work, it's my day off. And a colleague is there. Standing outside. Promoting our loyalty card. Yep, it starts today.
While you've been at play Reading stuff And writing sonnets all day Guess how I've whiled my day away. An awful job, yes, with Bob But this time it's not his fault It was our bi-annual honer assault.
So my first week of the dreaded return to work is almost over.
I'm a shit bus driver, I tend to get lost everyday. I'll overcharge you if you get on, then I'll ask you the way. I drink while I'm working and I'm always smoking drugs.
An early bird, I'll never be. 6am start, Is not for me. The chirpy peeps, They celebrate. Their perkiness, Begins to grate. My head's a fuzz, The tablet's in. To get me through, It's such a sin.
Found out something a little surprising today. A customer told me something that made my day. My nickname amongst the female cooks Is the housewives choice. Not how it looks.