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There once was a fellow named Tim, Who was never informed how to swim, He fell off a dock, And sunk like a rock, And that was the end of him!.
There was an Old Man with a beard, Who said, 'It is just as I feared. Two Owls and a Hen, Four Larks and a Wren, Have all built their nests in my beard!'.
There was a young man from Japan, Who's limericks were rather a scam. When asked one day why. He simply replied, "Well I try to get as many words in the last line as I possibly can.".
There was a young man from Leeds, Who swallowed a packet of seeds, Within an hour his dick was a flower and his balls were covered in weeds..
There once was a lady from crew, Whos limericks stopped at line 2..
Beautifully representing peace like a small white dove, Perfectly crafted by Angels high in heaven up above, Though we are apart, Bestill my heart, For, forever and so on you are my love..
I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host. -Dorothy Parker.
I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host. -Dorothy Parker.
I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host. -Dorothy Parker.
There once was a girl called Sue, Whos brother scared her with a "Boo!", She kicked him in the balls, His screams echoed round the halls, Be careful in case she gets you!.
There once was a man from brazil Who swallowed a dynamite pill His head twisted round, and fell to the ground That poor young man from brazil!.
The man with the world's biggest penis Was placed in his own unique genus "Giganticus Wang" Was the sign that would hang In the section next to the hyenas.
A rugby match played under water Is quite like a vicar's young daughter Although not so much Except for the touch Of strapping young men where they n'oughta.
If you shoot yourself up with cocaine Something funny will snap in your brain You'll crave dirty sex On the Welsh Office steps Whilst throwing your shoes down the drain.
Crunch He's a mat cat A bed cat A sleepy cat A pillow cat He's a hunger cat But he is my cat My own cat My favourite cat The end.
The original nutta a London slice of bread and butter, 10 years later you life Is in the gutter there no lights who closed The shutter.
There was a man called Sprockett. Who went to the moon on a rocket. The rocket went bang, his balls went clang and they found his cock in his pocket!.
There was a girl called Polly Who had a dolly Who went missin Cause it was kissin A big fat trolley.
There was a girl called Polly Who had a dolly Who went missin Cause it was kissin A big fat trolley.
There was a woman from Calais Who loved to do ballet She fell flat on her face It was a disgrace Oh that woman from Calais.
To hide my fear I became ignorant. To hide my ignorance I became arrogant. to hide my arrogance I became distant. To hide my distance I became obtuse. To hide my angle I hid myself.
The 1st line starts with a burst The 2nd line rhymes with the first The 3rd line is short The 4th the same sort And the last line is often the worst.
There was a young man from Skye, Who stuck his head in a pie; He walked round the ocean, And drank a bottle of lotion, That vexed the fisherman of Skye..
There once was a man with no name, He went into town for a game, He lost his deposit and thought then just fuck it, As he walked home fill with great shame..