Making Cakes
There was a little girl and her mother walking through the park one day and they saw two teenagers having sex on a bench.
10
1
120 words
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Ice Dispenser
Ice dispenser instruction manual. 1: Hold cup under dispenser, push button, and, after one second, one ice cube will be dispensed.
16
2
73 words
Good Ol Johnny
Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods. Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing.
88
5
220 words
A Man, A Cane, And An Alligator
A man limps into a bar with a cane and an alligator.
28
2
131 words
There are bastards on the Downs at dusk
They won't hurt, said the horrible woman. One of them ate Frank, while the other watched.
0
0
261 words
Untitled
A couple had three kids named Somebody, Nobody and Crazy. Nobody was the favourite, Somebody was jealous so he killed Nobody. Crazy saw what happened so he called the police...
24
2
47 words
Which Answer?
Q: What will happen if we continue destroying the earth. A: Dude, we're not destroying the earth. IT'S ALL A GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY. B: Zombie apocalypse, bro.
6
8
49 words
Gates Of Heaven
Three men walk up to the pearly gates of heaven, St. peter is there to greet them.
12
0
496 words
Hunting
Two hunters are in the forest. One of them sees something moving, and shoots. He hears a scream. He runs over, and sees that he has shot his friend. Extremely worried. He quickly dialled 999.
72
8
94 words
Scooter Gangs
They roam the streets on two wheels, their laughing and shouting strikes fear into the hearts of the everyday man and woman, soon the pavements we walk on won't be safe, Britain is being taken over...
4
0
237 words
CIA Final Test
The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists: two men and one woman.
100
3
248 words
Legs Akimbo
Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air.
22
0
174 words
Death Has Many Arms
An explanation Firstly this isn't my normal style, area or even something that I think is reasonably good.
2
0
144 words
The Bacon Tree
Two Mexicans have been lost in the desert for days. Crawling on their hands and knees and at death's door, they see a tree in the distance.
0
0
182 words
The Salesman
A confident salesman walks into a house, pours dirt onto the floor, and says to the shocked woman who lives in the house: "if this vacuum cleaner can't clean away this dirt.
68
6
112 words
Why We Need A New World Order...
If there were to be one single peace-loving government of the world, no border would close, no child would be left uneducated, there would be universal healthcare, employment could be shared so all...
4
7
132 words
Fairies
I am starting a new religion. In my religion, Larry Grayson is Lord of All Things and evil fairies do his bidding here on earth.
0
2
187 words
Poor Soul :-)
A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God, I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or...
6
0
167 words
Who Lives In A Pineapple
Friend: Who live in a pineapple under the sea..... Me: I do Friend: What happened to Spongebob.
4
3
131 words
The Vet
"A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him.
22
1
66 words
African Safari
I stand in the middle of an african plain. Paras my guide, the man who has already saved my life, gestures to some animal droppings, "polkoku", he rumbles. The droppings are large, brown & stacked.
0
0
289 words
Daddy Daddy Daddy
There was a man driving home with his son, he was pulled over by a police man and he said BASTARD!!!. His son says 'daddy daddy daddy' what does bastard mean. it means police man, ok.
2
1
185 words
They're Coming To Take Me Away ...
Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees and begged you not to leave because I'd go berserk?. Well...
4
0
352 words
Uncle William
"A wealthy family hired an author to write the family history, but expressed that he would have to soft-pedal the fact that an uncle had ended his life of crime in the electric chair.
20
1
76 words