Doctor Visit
Man goes to Doctor. Doc says: "You've got to stop masturbating." Man: "Why?" Doc: "Because I'm trying to examine you".
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Untitled
How do you make a door scream. -pull its nob.
42
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10 words
3 Kings
Teacher: "Johnny, can you tell me the name of 3 great kings who have brought happiness and peace into people's lives?" Little Johnny: Drin-king, smo-king, and fuc-king..
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27 words
Whales
Two whales, a male and a female, were swimming side by side in the ocean. Suddenly, the male whale spots a ship in the distance. He recognizes it as the whaling ship that killed his father.
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6
218 words
Social Media
"Social media is like teenage sex -- everyone wants to do it.
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42 words
Let's Move Commercial
And I quote "What are you waiting for. Your ball needs you." Am I the only person who thinks that sounds so wrong. ~TV!.
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24 words
:)
There's a guy having an affair with a mans wife, the two are right in the middle when they hear a car pull into the driveway. "Get out!" The wife yelled.
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117 words
Joke?
For a moment I was ranked 69th on opuss.
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9 words
When I Was A Kid
When I was a kid, PUSSY meant CAT, SEX meant GENDER, BITCH meant a FEMALE DOG, DICK was a NAME, BJ was a NICK-NAME, BANG was a SOUND, RUBBER was just like PLASTIC, ASS was an ANIMAL, SCREW was just...
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59 words
Traditional Irish Wedding!:)
A wedding occurred just outside Cavan in Ireland.
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235 words
Dane Cook Joke
Guy 1 stands behind Guy 2 in line. Guy 2 sneeze Guy 1: bless you Guy 2: oh sorry, i dont believe in God, I am an atheist. Guy 1: oh, so if you are an atheist, what do you become when you die.
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99 words
Camping
Three men are in the woods. They all have to go to the bathroom. There is nothing to wipe their butt with, but they eack have a dollar. The first man gets back. He says "I had a dollar.
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Escaped Convict Of Love
A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed.
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204 words
Coco Pops
A 7 year old boy and his 4 year old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?, says the 7 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing". The 4 year old nods his head in...
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149 words
Untitled
Test Gangu.
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2 words
Untitled
Hey babe, wanna come over to MySpace and Twitter my Opuss 'til I google+ all over your Facebook?.
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18 words
Untitled
Why did the girl Fall the swing. Cos she had I arms.
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12 words
What Are The Odds?
Whenever you say ˝what are the odds?˝ Around Asians they will tell you exactly what they are..
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17 words
Lala
What is the fuck app!.
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5 words
Untitled
上班路上！.
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Untitled
Daughter: Dad, I'm a lesbian. Dad: oh that's cool. 2nd daughter: Dad, I'm a lesbian too. Dad: GOD DAMMIT does anyone in this house like cock!!. Son: I do. :) !!.
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31 words
Good Morning...
I see the assassins have failed..
150
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6 words
Rash.
I was showing my doctor a nasty rash on my cock today. He seemed pretty uncomfortable and didn't want to touch it.
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39 words
Argot: Power of Attorney
Power of Attorney of your YaYa-Sisterhood; kinda like an adult way of saying 'I got your taco, Gurl!'.
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18 words