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sjw
sjw

The Golden Egg

Challenge set by @eddie12309 There was a girl called poppy Who really was quite soppy Whenever she walked in the grass and it tickled her ass She would lay a golden egg plopped from between her...

24 13 83 words
leelee101
leelee101

Notion

@eddie12309. Improvisation challenge. Young Eddie had a notion. To write pieces of ova-emotion. But eggs really smell. Do best not to dwell. In case it caused a commotion. All this piece really needs.

34 12 55 words
naaviie
naaviie

Underwear Curse

There is a dear little Irish lass, Always loosing the cloth covering her ass.

30 4 129 words
HeatherAnne
HeatherAnne

Recipe For Disaster!

I've been told to cook, A meal for my dad, The problem being I can't cook, I'm well aware it's sad. The kitchen's rather scary, A foreign, scary place, I domain I avoid, I rarely show my face.

46 4 130 words
IndiaSparrow
IndiaSparrow

Mister Backspace

Mister Backspace button And Misters M and N Everyday it happens that I accidentally send again What's the point of being Next to the button Send When your so small, hard to hit.

50 10 165 words
Odd
Odd

My Pet Fish

I have two pet fish, Thea and Freckles... They're over two years old. You'd think by now I'd be used to them, Not doing as they told. I ask them to be quiet, When I'm trying to sleep.

6 0 99 words
nikujagagirl
nikujagagirl

Things that are pure evil

Here is a list of things that I think are pure evil: Soap operas, teenage soap operas, commercials, little kid shows, the song "Call me maybe," ventriloquism dummies, all those evil racist...

16 4 92 words
leelee101
leelee101

Ned

There was a vampire called Ned Who wasn't always dead He came alive At half past five To paint his coffin red And then later at night Ned leaves behind the light He stalks the land Paint brush in...

52 36 92 words
HeatherAnne
HeatherAnne

Malicious Things, Bricks.

Today, I kicked a brick, An accident, of course, And after my foot connected, I yelled myself hoarse.

50 7 125 words
Clairabethy
Clairabethy

A Dogs Life

Oh I think a dog I'd be, to lie smugly by the fire, I'd bark at a cat or a fly or a man, or anything else I'd desire.

16 2 132 words
rayleen43
rayleen43

My Man!

Lying beside me is my man Fast asleep, I'll wake him in a min that's the plan How shall I do it.

2 1 114 words
Odd
Odd

Life Without Thumbs

-a gibberish poem really. Reminds me of that milk advert... But strangely not inspired by- What would life be like if we didn't have thumbs. Doors would be different, And we couldn't shoot guns.

22 1 121 words
misslittleDHP
misslittleDHP

Parp Spray

Wouldn't it be good For every fart you do Out of your bottom A spritz of aroma came too.

40 18 63 words
eddie12309
eddie12309

No Place To Hide

Just a bit of fun inspired by@PoppyA Offside Rules. Football crazy. Football mad. Footy on the telly. Footy on the pad. Footy in the paper. Footy in the pub. Footy on the radio. Footy in the tub.

10 2 49 words
PoppyA
PoppyA

The Offside Rules

If you really want us to watch football, If you really really do, There are a few things you should and should 't do; Sit the hell down and don't shout in my ear.

46 35 161 words
misslittleDHP
misslittleDHP

Funny Man

I know a funny man He puts a smile upon my face He can write about anything A rhino ass or a place He makes me really chuckle What words he can write He is magic with words He makes a heavy heart...

38 13 68 words
TheUnfortunateOne
TheUnfortunateOne

Untitled

Friday, 11 February 2011A Mans Essential Guide to PMTEvening Campas Before i start with the useful print out information guide i would like to share with you my crap day.

0 0 1442 words
TheUnfortunateOne
TheUnfortunateOne

Untitled

Friday, 28 January 2011Where the Hell did thursday go??Ill Start Backwards, My therapist says that's probably best and then i may actually forget some of the stuff that has happened :0/ Good evening...

0 0 875 words
puffy1980
puffy1980

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the day The world has been awaiting The result is on a knife edge Everything to play for Everything to fight for Nobody can predict the score Everyone has hearts in mouths What will the...

20 2 81 words
Dont_Cry
Dont_Cry

Stupid Exams

Math test: A farmer plants 7 crops of tomatoes and 3 crops of carrots- what is the probability that his mothers name is Leslie.

42 3 89 words
Danish
Danish

Texts From My Dog 72

DOG: WHERE ARE YOU. On my way to the supermarket DOG: OMG WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK. FFS, I just left. I said 'see you soon' remember. DOG: NO. WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK.

80 1 84 words
HeatherAnne
HeatherAnne

Twisted Logic.

Three mile runs, Letting off some steam, Getting home then eating, My weight in ice cream. Chocolate gooey goodness, Undoing all the run, Feeling really bloated, Like I weigh a ton.

22 2 54 words
nikujagagirl
nikujagagirl

How A Little Girl ruined My life chapter 1

Hi, my name's Deric. Deric Caleb Bellamy. I'm 25 years old. I've got dark, brown hair, tan skin, hazel eyes, and I'm super muscular.

32 13 1085 words
sojo
sojo

Expensive Barbie

A man was driving home one evening and realized that it was his daughter's birthday and he hadn't bought her a present.

38 14 129 words
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