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From now on in going to write my day to day story :) This morning I woke up from a terrible dream about the author dontest. By the time I was actually ready for school I was starving.
I don't really know when or why it started, my depression. Tried to cheer myself up, smile for a brighter expression, it sometimes works. Sometimes I'm smiling outside, crying in my interior.
I learned a long time ago never to expect anything from anyone. I definitely never expected the person who could make you so happy could be the person who would be your weakness. I feel sad and empty.
It's disheartening to know that what I want the most,...I just can't have. Perhaps even more sorrowing is that not a single person in the known universe can possibly assist me in getting what I want.
I always wonder about raindrops.
Sometimes I feel like it would be better to not exist, or that the world would be better without me, but it's a fleeting thought.
You don't see what I'm hiding behind this smile. All the hurt. All the pain. All the anger. All the tears. All the thoughts. All the words. All the expressions. All the tears. All the time.
Is depression an illness. I mean they say it is and i have it but.. Well its not terminal cant kill me.. Well unless i top myself. Im medicated yes and it helps i guess.
My glasses broke (the ear piece fell off again) and i'm home alone (head hurts waaaaay too bad to put up with teachers and loud kids) and i'm blind as a bat so can't fix them myself cause' i'd have...
Sometimes I feel like I'm not supposed to be here. I shuld have been dead instead I'm alive and I see clear.
~This poem is about Depersonalisation, a mental illness that I suffer from where I feel disconnected from my body. A lot of people who smoke weed develop it, but I attained it sober.
Why. Why do you feel the need to push, probe and prod all the way until the point of breaking.
Claustrophobia - extreme or irrational fear of confined places. "Gasp. I can't. Gasp. I need to get out of here. Gasp. Everyone else is breathing the air, my air. Gasp, gasp gasp. The room is so...
The world's about to see A side of me That I keep hidden Under lock and key A side never before seen You mother fuckers think I'm so clean Like if you had dreams of me I would be exactly like I...
Look at this, an histerical mess. Frustrated and betrayed. Why do you treat me so less. Talking with my best friend, thinkin thisll be the last straw.
Often I wish things were different. I don't have any actual regrets, life would just be easier if events played out in another way.
She needs to open her eyes I feel bad, feeding her lies She's just so innocent I can't ruin it. My past is there for me, Like a back up following me.
I have this group of lady bugs Bottleing up inside. I gave you a few of the ladybugs And now there yours to hide. But more lady bugs needed to get out, They just kept getting bigger. So I went to Mrs.
I'm riddled with anxiety tonight. I've suffered from panic attacks since I was fourteen, and Agoraphobia for a few years, but tonight feels uniquely frightening.
Fuck those "friends" who left you. Fuck that asshole who hurt you. Fuck that bitch who can't keep her mouth shut about you. Fuck that person who hurt you. Fuck that person who lied to you.
My sense of direction is very poor. Taking the right route is very rare. I appointed a chauffeur. With him on wheel, I travel all over.
I go back to college tomorrow after two weeks off. It's a horrific thought.
You're all strung out on disillusional thinking As the Government subsidizes these laboratory high rises with new prescription chemical surprises You continue to hide your true self behind those...
Dear Dad I hope you are well and the years have been kinder to you than they have been to me. Only because I couldn't wish ill on one of my parents, despite how devoid of common sense they are.