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PoppyA
PoppyA

Untitled

You stand there with your weapon in hand, This visit was impulsive, unplanned. You grin at me and tell me it'll be fine. Plain to see the only fear here is mine.

40 17 68 words
gazplend
gazplend

Gaz's Thoughts From Holiday In Devon

1. Thought I saw a dolphin in the sea. Turns out It wasn't hmmm.... 2. in woolacombe it seems that the surfers can't actually surf!. Hmm... 3.

10 14 85 words
sjw
sjw

A Girl And Her Passion.

Inspired by @PoppyA's bag poem  Shoes shoes a kingdom of shoes You guys think it's insane it gives you the blues All those lovely choices which ones shall I choose Your face says it all, you offer...

38 19 67 words
HeatherAnne
HeatherAnne

Grumpy Kitten.

Ahem. /\___/\ ( _ _ ) =( •_ )= I'm a grumpy little kitten, When I'm woken up too early, I'll meow rather angrily, And my tone will be quite surly.

22 7 52 words
LikeAFirefly
LikeAFirefly

I've Lost My Key

Oh my goodness deary me,. I've gone and lost my front door key,. Where it's gone a mystery,. Oh deary, deary, deary me,. My mobile phone was just the same,. A daily thing I've got no brain,.

18 5 119 words
PoppyA
PoppyA

Untitled

I love them all, Big and small. Round or square, I don't care. Brown, cream, black, red The colour don't mess with my head. I like the posh ones, The "oh gosh!" ones.

16 19 51 words
georgiacollard
georgiacollard

Contradiction!

This is an extract from the lessons your parents, teachers or guardians have told you through your life.... Some time , every day. Parents: Never lie, always be honest , honesty is the best policy.

18 6 102 words
sojo
sojo

My Very First Time

My Very First Time. The sky was dark. The moon was high. All alone just she and I. Her hair was soft. Her eyes were blue. I knew just what. She wanted to do. Her skin so soft. Her legs so fine.

50 27 114 words
sjw
sjw

A Girly Guide To Emotions

ANGER. When my guy leaves the toilet seat up. FEAR. They don't have those gorgeous shoes in my size. SADNESS.

32 15 68 words
leelee101
leelee101

Elf

Saw a little elf. Sitting by himself. Couldn't reach to put his teeth. Upon his bedroom shelf. He said excuse me, mate. Please place my dental plate. Upon my table, I'm unable. In my current state.

40 11 80 words
Hanni
Hanni

Lots Of Riddles

Every morning the farmer had eggs for breakfast. He owned no chickens and he never got eggs from anyone else's chickens. Where did he get the eggs. From his ducks.

2 0 344 words
misslittleDHP
misslittleDHP

Miss Mucus

I'm feeling so stuffy It makes me all huffy Snot city up my nose Just grows and grows Eyes are so heavy Need to be ready Gots lots to do But feeling blue Throats hurting too What am I to do.

22 14 78 words
LIAM7
LIAM7

Innocent Sex -

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of Tampax and proceeded to the checkout counter.

32 3 90 words
LeahLovesEC
LeahLovesEC

Up There Dumb No.2

Me textin my cat in heaven... Me: What's up. Cat: What's up, where. Me: Let me rephrase it, What u up 2. Cat: Oh right, having a pawicure. Me: O-K...weird....what's that. Cat: An animal pedicure.

8 4 58 words
gazplend
gazplend

Intense!!

My heart is beating so fast. My breathing is quick and hard. Can't take much more,I can't last. Man this thing is so intense. If I finish now she'll feel let down. Only been going for 30 seconds.

36 38 66 words
Jatt
Jatt

CAT

There once was a cat who lived in a city,. He rhymed all his words to make him seem witty,. All other cats he thought of as ditty,. except for one he regarded as pretty,.

40 10 77 words
unsuitableguy
unsuitableguy

My Favourite Things

*I've noticed how gloomy most of my stuff is. So here's something short and happy. *inspired by Julie Andrews --------------------------------- No bans on hoses and sunshine in Britain.

60 11 134 words
misslittleDHP
misslittleDHP

Hand Of Cards

Holding the cards in her hand. She glances at those close by. Giving a little smirk. They are wondering why. She sits there, watching each turn. Soon it'll be her turn next. Little do they know.

24 13 118 words
gazplend
gazplend

I Love Your Mum?!?!

I love your face I love your body I love your grace I love your erm...noddy. I love your knockers I love your brain I love your socks I love your erm...train.

24 3 53 words
Clairabethy
Clairabethy

Cape Rationale

I'd like a cape, I'll tell you why, I really think it'd help me fly. It could be blue, or pink with spots, Or paisley print with purple dots.

16 2 187 words
Delilah
Delilah

CDO

Sorry folks but because Of my mental boarders I can't end the day on An uneven number. I've got mild OCD (or rather CDO If they're in the right order.

52 10 152 words
LeahLovesEC
LeahLovesEC

Even More Stupid

1-Straightening your hair, when it's already straight. 2-Curling your hair, when it's curly. 3-Throwing bread in the water for ducks, when there is non. 4-Eating chocolate, on a no chocolate diet.

8 15 75 words
Delilah
Delilah

Alektorophobia

Nice chicken Good chicken Cooing in the coop, Happy chicken Pretty chicken I've just come for a look. Lovely chicken Tasty chicken Sorry, it just slipped out.

48 21 77 words
bryanrobertheap
bryanrobertheap

Male Pampering

After gardening chores on a hot summers day, My girlfriend asked me "are you okay?". "hell no" I said . I'm dirty and sore. This gardening lark is quite a hard chore.

36 18 197 words
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