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Late for school ------------------------------------------ age 6-Mommy,mommy i am late for school.WAAAAAA!!! age 10-oh my god I'm late for school. age 12-OH SHIT!!. Mom I'm late for school.
Enjoy your homework by R.U. Joking Out for the count. By I.C.Stars Cliff - Top rescue. By Justin Time Off to the Dentist. By U.First Broken Windows.
Just saying, this didn't actually happen to me... Me: Why the hell are you following me. Anonymous: My mom told me to follow my dreams... Me: That's sweet....but would you fuck off.
25% -- Daydreaming. 25% -- Building up courage to turn off water and step into cold air. 20% -- Turing in a circle to maintain even hot water distribution.
Day 8) a diary entry from a pet's perspective. Dear Diary, Today I ate some carrots. They tasted of disappointment, seeing as Wednesday is cabbage night. Sigh. Stupid humans, think they're all it.
You lie curled up by the fire, Chewing whatever be tonight's object of desire. You barely have to lift an eyelid, And prised open is the cat food tin lid.
I'm so bloody knackered, I Can't hardly think, Everything's an effort, I haven't slept a wink. My footsteps are dragging, Work is just a slog, The clock's ticking slower, My mind is just a fog.
After trying yet another of McDonalds' limited edition "Speciality Tastes" burgers, I think it's high time they just own up and admit that ALL of their burgers will inevitably taste exactly the same,...
Day 8: A diary entry in a pet's perspective. 11th May, 2012. Smudge Bryan, England, The Shed. 7:00am- Ugh, humans again, I can hear them all the way from our haven.
Okay, so I go over to talk to my friends and this is the conversation: Me: Hey guys. Friend 1: What's the hole in a bagel for. Me: Uhh I dunno...
FAKE FRIENDS - NEVER ASK FOR FOOD. - REAL FRIENDS - ARE THE REASONS YOU HAVE NO FOOD. - FAKE FRIENDS - NEVER SEEN YOU CRY. - REAL FRIENDS - CRY WITH YOU. - FAKE FRIENDS - KNOW A FEW THINGS ABOUT YOU.
It was Grandpa Jones' 100th birthday and he was still in perfect health. At his birthday party he was asked how he managed to live so long and stay so fit.
I popped into the pet shop to stock up on essentials like dog food and poo bags. Full circle purchases. I on whim bought a squeaky toy. Taking the food out of the bag I left it lying by the door.
10. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again. 9. I'm not drunk I'm just intoxicated by you. 8. If beauty were time, you'd be eternity. 7.
A brash young man drove into town To eat the hottest food around He looked out for a place to dine A sign said "Ed's", that'll do fine He walked right in, sat right down Ed just looked him up and...
THIS MAY BE A "Little" DIFFICULT FOR ALL WHO ARE OVER 60 ..THOSE YOUNGER THAN THIS WILL HAVE NO HOPE AT ALL. DEMENTIA QUIZ FIRST QUESTION : YOU ARE A PARTICIPANT IN A RACE.
1. Ten percent of all car thieves are left-handed 2. All polar bears are left-handed 3. If your car is stolen, there's a 10 percent chance it was taken by a Polar bear 1.
Won't be writing much today But please don't think me gone I can't resist, Opuss I'll miss It's just my day'll be long. And horrible and messy and tiring... Bloody work.
I get myself in quite a state, Desperate to concentrate... The ending lines - they will not come. My fingers twitch. My head is numb.
When a package arrives I quickly open it wide, And hastily remove all the stuff found inside, I discard all items except the plastic wrap, That piece with bubbles in which air is trapped.
My word for today is: 'Lugubrious' Which means mournful, dismal or gloomy. I'm going to try to use it as many times as possible.
A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white. "His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's happy and this is the happiest day of her life.
The Teacher tells the class they are going to play a game,she will describe an object and the students will tell her what she had described. Teacher: "The first object is Red, Round, and has a stem.
There was this bartender & he was working at the bar one night. In walked a group of blondes & they were chanting "44 days.