Bitchiness.
Maybe you should eat some of that lipstick to make you pretty inside (:.
12
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14 words
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Gravity
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off..
34
2
10 words
Nerds
"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one." -Bill Gates.
42
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14 words
Wouldn't It Be Nice...
Wouldn't life be perfect if sweatpants were sexy,. Monday's were fun,. Junk food was good for you,. homework didn't exist,. girls weren't drama queens,. guys weren't losers,.
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34 words
Happy Easter
I bet the Easter Bunny is best friends with Santa Claus(;.
2
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11 words
When Life Gives You Lemons…
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade, make life take the lemons back. GET MAD. I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these. - Cave Johnson, Portal 2.
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35 words
Untitled
If you can do something today, don't bother..
2
2
8 words
To Hell I Drive
We are all going to hell!!. And I am driving the bus ;).
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13 words
123
When your mum starts counting to three: 1. You don't care. 2. You're getting scared... 3. You nearly sh*t your self and bolt out the room..
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26 words
Happy Dead Jesus
I wake up go down stairs see my mum and she give me a cup with a little choclate bunny in it She looks at me and says " happy dead jesus" . Yea that ?.
2
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36 words
Untitled
Iv got a jar of dirt iv got a jar of dirt and guess what's in it - jack sparrow (aka:Johnny depp).
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22 words
Untitled
"I believe that what doesn't kill you, simply makes you stranger." - The Joker..
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14 words
Untitled
Charlie: "oh yeah, five's an odd number isn't it?".
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9 words
Untitled
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg.
20
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15 words
Why?
Why are drive throughs called drive throughs when you have to stop?.
6
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12 words
Um From Umbradge
Anyone with a head that large is welcome in My Court. Someone find her some clothes, use the curtains if You Must but clothe this enormous girl..
6
1
27 words
Vending Machines
The Vending Machine Theory : "Stuff tastes better when it falls"..
4
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11 words
Without Me
Without me, it's just aweso..
4
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5 words
Leonardo diCaprio
Is it just me or is Leonardo diCaprio's acting in 'Titanic' pretty cheesy?!?.
8
4
13 words
Untitled
"Paul's so laid back he's almost vertical!" "Err, do you mean horizontal?" "...".
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13 words
Untitled
"Look. There's an ice cream van!" "Tom, that's an ambulance...".
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1
10 words
Untitled
"that accordian player is really quite good but if he plays Thomas the Tank Engine one more time I'm gonna kill him.".
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22 words
Untitled
"either move or get out of the way".
4
3
8 words
Untitled
A chinese man trying to pronounce longmoor: 'Wongmoor'.
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8 words