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iPuss
iPuss

Topsy Turvey Town

Inspired by @SmellyFingers. Welcome to Topsy Turvey Town. This is a place where things that are up are actualy things that are down. Nothing stranger than a sight to see like a dog walking a human.

36 9 254 words
LIAM7
LIAM7

Jokes

When i grow up, i wanna be an imaginary friend What do you do when u have a tiger chasing you from behind, a bear on your right and cheetah on your left. GET YOUR DRUNK BUTT OF THE MERRY GO...

12 1 102 words
Dovahkiin
Dovahkiin

Mr Moonshine

(By @naaviie and @Dovahkiin) Sunlight splits into glitter, Over the taste of something bitter. Not a feeling, not a word. Something that's quite frankly absurd. Like a top hat on a lion.

32 6 129 words
aleishagayle20
aleishagayle20

Tick Tock Jatty Pratty

Hickory dick-your-ey dock @Jatt ran up the fucking clock The clock struck one @Seamonster brought him tumbling down Hickory fickle-ry clock Tick tock.

20 10 50 words
LeahLovesEC
LeahLovesEC

Up There Dumb No.2

Me textin my cat in heaven... Me: What's up. Cat: What's up, where. Me: Let me rephrase it, What u up 2. Cat: Oh right, having a pawicure. Me: O-K...weird....what's that. Cat: An animal pedicure.

8 4 58 words
Danish
Danish

Texts From My Dog 64

DOG: tip top day. Made a new enemy Stop. Making. Enemies. DOG: he drives around in a van playing music to LURE KIDS INTO HIS WEB OF EVIL He sells ICE CREAM. DOG: YEAH.

62 1 67 words
sojo
sojo

Happy Go Lucky; Lee Evans

The Suicide Song lyrics there was a young man from gosham who took out his bollocks to wash em his wife said "jack if you don't put them back, ill stand on the bastards and squash em" But what I'd...

8 2 312 words
OllieBoyne
OllieBoyne

The Square Ball

I once heard of an object, Oh so peculiar, That did not decide to be round. Now, being a ball, This was quite strange and all, And my questions began to mound.

18 4 174 words
Zorua101
Zorua101

BGT Trouble

Does anyone remember that rapper on Britian's Got Talent. 'Lost my keys, Lost my phone' guy.

8 2 178 words
Hanni
Hanni

From A Mother With Love

Dear Child, I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home.

32 0 371 words
tattyteddy
tattyteddy

Strawberries

Monday morning at the doctors, all was quiet until a man slammed open the door and cried, 'Doctor doctor, what should I do ive got strawberries growing out of my head, what should I do??".

20 7 56 words
Weirdwolf
Weirdwolf

The Happiest Goblin

One upon a NikNak pack, underneath a hedge, lived the happiest Goblin ever. ......... and his name was Reg.

48 25 65 words
LIAM7
LIAM7

A LETTER FROM A BLONDE TO HER DAUGHTER

Dear Lily, I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home, we moved.

10 3 203 words
misslittleDHP
misslittleDHP

Jack And The Beans Talk

Jack was a happy chappy Even though he was poor He was given some beans He wondered whatever for.

12 2 161 words
kivihe
kivihe

A Transformer!

Quirky funny one. Enjoy. I am superb, I'm a man... I want to be a superman!. I have garbage, I have a can. I'm a friends garbage can. I have teeth, and a brush, Let me be your toothbrush.

30 29 98 words
StanWelch528491
StanWelch528491

Roses Are Red...

Roses are red, violets are blue, SHIT. wrong poem. Happy birthday to you. Roses are red, violets are blue, If I can't have you, NO ONE CAN. Roses are red, violets are violet...

32 7 185 words
Eatonlynch
Eatonlynch

Things to do

If you get caught masturbating say something friendly to avoid awkwardness, like; "Hey. I was just thinking of you!!" Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say, "Help.

36 6 147 words
Noonington
Noonington

We're All Mad Here...

There's a time of which none speak, A secret time lost in the briny deep. You know all about... Half time, big time, break time, lunch time, dinner time.

6 1 106 words
Eatonlynch
Eatonlynch

DUDE!! (300 Post!)

--------- Dude, she called you awkward. Oh hell no hold my turtle. ------- Dude, she called you short. Oh hell no lift me up. -------- Dude, she called you a thief. Oh hell no hold her purse.

14 0 163 words
Eatonlynch
Eatonlynch

Signs That Things Aren't Going So Well

---------- You hear loud noises coming from your parent's bedroom. Your dad is on away on a business trip...

32 1 189 words
Emily_InspiresAll
Emily_InspiresAll

My Friend Gaz.

There was a young girl I called gaz, Who was addicted to the smell of daz, But she went too far, And the outcome was bizarre, Well at least she wasn't a spaz.

4 4 133 words
naaviie
naaviie

Square Hare

Don't stop to compare,. A hare, with a square,. You won't get very far,. In a cream-filled car,. Like a tortoise on speed,. That dragon's drinking mead,. When clouds fall from the skies,.

26 5 56 words
JamieGreen95
JamieGreen95

Island Antics

3 people were stuck on an island, with no hope of swimming to the mainland. Suddenly, God turns up and says for them to go into the forest and get 10 of one fruit.

10 2 138 words
dewday0483
dewday0483

Untitled

I swam through the pool. I was mighty and strong. Until I saw something. Terribly wrong. I saw a fish. With trunks on. And worse than that. The pong. I swam through the pool. I was mighty and strong.

10 2 100 words
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