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Showing stories tagged with #limerick Clear filter

Burrfoot
Burrfoot

My Name

Out into the world I was shoved By several strangers all gloved Mum took one look Closed the naming book And said 'David you are beloved'.

26 2 26 words
iPuss
iPuss

Russian Lady

There's a sexy lady who is Russian. Men whistled, she tried to hush' em. She pulled down their smalls. She stomped on their balls. She damn near tried to crush 'em!.

38 4 31 words
MelchiorJ13
MelchiorJ13

Camels and Llamas

Camel and llama, Both met in a sauna, To discuss the wonders of flight, They fell asleep talking long into the night, While feigning Polish melodrama..

10 1 26 words
HalfLifeStella
HalfLifeStella

For You, Beloved Nan And Namesake

A star that once shimmered, disappearing from sight Could etch no such memory, nor burn so bright That it would seem as indestructible as you did.

4 0 176 words
puffy1980
puffy1980

Sleepy Wife

Being alone does suck I guess I am out of luck Feeling frisky It's a little risky But all I need is a fuck.

10 2 24 words
Lucky112
Lucky112

A Frog Named Bob

There once was a frog named Bob, Who ate lots of corn on the cob, He got really fat, Then fell flat, And was trampled by an angry mob, (I feel sorry for Bob!. He was a lovely frog.

16 6 53 words
iPuss
iPuss

40 Years Naughty

@MissLittleDHP Ah... Kim you may well be forty. But you're still so sexy and naughty. Winking at us in DHP Style. You deserve to be happy & smile.

28 2 37 words
isntitnot
isntitnot

Pirate Pegs

#household - peg(s) Peg leg Pete Has wooden stumps for feet. It might sound bizarre, But when he goes aaargh It means he's reading a tweet..

14 3 26 words
iPuss
iPuss

Today

Today im going to a woolen mill. Trust me against my own will. But its because of my mum. That i've got to come. I hope the car journey wont make me ill....

22 0 33 words
Lucky112
Lucky112

A Fly

There once was a fly on the wall, I wonder why didn't it fall, Because its feet stuck, Or was it just luck, Or does gravity miss things so small?.

16 3 30 words
iPuss
iPuss

BORED

Im feeling really bored at work. The silence is driving me biserk. So I come up with awful limericks. Hoping the clock quickly ticks. Posting them on Opuss with a smirk....

26 0 31 words
iPuss
iPuss

Opuss Is Sleeping

On Opuss nothing's made a peep. It seems every one is asleep. This just isnt right. Sleeping is for the night. Can't you lot hear the alarm clock beep?!.

28 13 29 words
casualhero
casualhero

Weekend Fun

The weekend is finally here!. It's time for some good friends and cheer. The sun is about, The bbq's out. And now for some wine and some beer. Hic!.

32 3 29 words
iPuss
iPuss

Happy Birthday

@Mort Happy birthday you old timer. Well done on being a brill rhymer. You've done really well. We can really tell. Now go get your' birthday vagina!.

24 6 27 words
Burrfoot
Burrfoot

Water Fall

I often marvel at its awesome power Feeding everything from man to flower Water is king But here's the thing I much prefer a golden shower #household.

20 5 26 words
isntitnot
isntitnot

Alas Too Late

Been away from opuss for a bit fighting the constant war with laziness and apathy. Any way while browsing the feed catching up on some stuff noticed #household going on.

6 0 177 words
nikujagagirl
nikujagagirl

Honey

There once was a lady named Honey. Who everyone thought was funny. She went to lunch With a rather friendly bunch. But that all ended when she found out she had no money!.

16 0 33 words
iPuss
iPuss

Man And Woman

There was a man getting ideas. This was a womans fears. They didnt get along. She told him he was wrong. So he went back to sipping beers!.

24 2 28 words
glen
glen

Sharks Tale

I'm so glad, I don't live in a tank I once ate a guy named Hank I bit off his head He's definitely dead And what I didn't eat sank I swam from Australia to Cuba I ate a guy doing scuba with his...

58 28 249 words
iPuss
iPuss

A Limerick To You

There once was a king called Lee. Who loved to drink a lot of tea. He made a new law. There would be tea galore. Because he made it all free. There was a gorrila named Glen.

38 10 201 words
therapper3lm0
therapper3lm0

DREAM ON

I fall into a life like dream, So calm and peaceful. The beauty in the sky is seen, There's lots of trees and people. And I can sit or do what I please, There's no rules to a dreamer.

6 0 55 words
Platypus
Platypus

The Written Word

Can you make it sound romantic when it's dead. Can you make it sound fantastic in your head.

12 0 40 words
brownowl2012
brownowl2012

Mr Delorian

#household - teabag There once was a teabag emporium, Run by a Mr Delorian. One day he went crazy, Set fire to Miss Daisy... Here's to a crazy memoriam. ©brownowl2012.

14 4 30 words
MrsS
MrsS

Ok, Here They Come - You Are Warned!!

#teabag @leelee101 Don't usually join in, but thought I'd give it a bash...

32 11 206 words
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