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One day, maybe it was Tuesday or Friday...whatever Jimmothy was a moose and didn't really give a shit...the moose named Jimmothy went to market.
So... I have done something which could have been good, could have been bad. I haven't decided yet, but who cares. I wrote a letter to Noel Fielding.
So I have so far been on two and a half dates with tall dark and handsome, and so far things do seem to be going really rather well.
I have the necessary koalaifocations says the koala bear. Your koalaifocations are completely irrelephant says the elephant. Don't listen him, he's lion, says the lion.
Have you ever tried to resist the course of nature. Well, if you haven’t, don’t. I’m here to tell you, there will be consequences and repercussions. The stuff that happened to me was amazing.
Phil's in the room, yea Phil's in the room, we are in the room and Phil's in the room. (Phil's in the room) We are in this room cos Phil's in the room, no doom and gloom when Phil's in the room.
Just bought a dog from cross channel Terry The size of a bear and brown and hairy Massive paws and stands up tall and growls In the back garden it snorts and prowls Just rang Terry up and asked...
Dear Reader, Today is the first day of school here in California, and just let me tell you;people here are weird. It is technically he first day of school here, but i've just moved here from Texas.
So I went out on a date last night. Yes people I actually went out on a date. Now for those of you that know me are well aware of how I feel when it comes to dating, and boys blah blah blah.
There are lots of little things in this life, that cause you trouble, that cause you strife, Theres not a lot you can say or a lot that you can do, Once shoe poo happens to you, It sneaks up on you...
I'm a shit fireman because I'm shit scared of fire. My boss has got the hump and he calls me a liar. I don't know what it is that makes me run from the flame.
Introduction This is a made up story it actually did'ent happen to me or eneything .i sooo hope u enjoy it .
Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts, while others come into our lives and make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
#ralphsreturn You've probably heard of him before, his name might send shivers up your spine, chill you to the bone, maybe even remind you of that restraining order that never seemed to work or of...
This is a slightly morbid hallowe'en edition for @Irrational_Kimmi, on account of our personal joke of setting trick or treaters on fire.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming.
@sjw Whoa, Sienna. What a mess. (I know the 80's made your dress,) But, just because I said the truth, Does not mean you can stalk, stalk, sleuth. At my door, with a belt, you say.
Fire eating maniacs, Ball juggling fools. Big, fat elephants, Dancing upon stools. A big ring leading idiot, With a great booming voice. Men fired from cannons, Without getting much choice.
Nelson: Please don't make me sing Alyssa. Alyssa: It's a musical, Nelson. We ALL have to sing. Nelson: *sighs* oh geez. Alyssa: Well, it'd be simply illogical if *looks over* aannnddd he's gone.
As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.
#opussweeklychallenge When Ralphie met Fluffles, Good God. The kerfuffles. The room was *meow* *snuffles*, All catnip and truffles.
We're cool for cats, crazeeee for lurve. We like a bit of skirt, and plenty of curve. Our last night out, I admit, wasn't a success. My brown cords ripped and my hair was a mess.
As Hallowe'en approaches, one thing I know for sure This year I won't electrify the handle of my door I promise to join in and not pretend that I am out And I won't insult kids costumes if their...
#halloweenparty With the book I opened yesterday I summon thee demon, appear I say.