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Chapter 1 The garden of mr batten Mr batten was a fierce old bloke with a flaming red beard and two terrifying bloodshot eyes that always stated out at you, like a bear who has just been woken in...
Vera Hose. Where she goes. Nobody knows. Into town. With a frown. Bra upside down. Trousers on. Under a thong. So so wrong. Mascara of blue. Wearing one shoe. In hand, Special Brew. Vera Hose.
“Right this way Sir.” Said John as he lead the latest client into the most bizarre habitat he would ever likely encounter. The flat was, different to many others.
Yesterday I spoke with the most famous villain hunter in all of Opussia - Major Magpie. Although well past his prime, he still effortlessly delivers his signature humiliation move - the super wedgie.
Theres a new crazie on board the train. And soon all shall know his name. He's governed by the moon. And his stereotypes go boom. He's all kinds of different crazie's.
Hairy Mary works at big daves dairy. She looks like a witch but dresses like a fairy. Evenings and weekends she can often be found. Trying to free cats from the RSPCA pound.
Looking out my window I see a strange man. With beard and flip flops shouting at a parked van. It's 10 degrees but he's in shorts and vest. Now I like strangeness but he's putting me to the test.