14 April 2012
There was an Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman working on a building site. Everyday, during their lunch break they would make their way to the top of the scaffolding and eat their packed lunches. The Englishman opens his. 'By Jove! Beef sandwiches! Again?' He exclaims. 'I tell you chaps, if my wife makes me another bloody beef sandwich I am going to throw myself off this scaffolding!' The Scotsman opens his packed lunch, and peers inside. 'Och aye!' He cries. 'Another haggis sandwich! I tell ye laddies, if ma' wiffie packs even one more wee haggis sandwich, I will follow you down tha' scaffolding.' The Irishman comes to open his lunch. 'Like oi' guessed. A bleedin' potato sandwich!' The Irishman says in disdain. 'If my wife makes me eat another potato sandwich it will be my last!'
The very next day, at lunchtime, the three men open their packed lunches as usual, on the top of the scaffolding. The Englishman, to no surprise, finds a beef sandwich. 'That's it!' He yells, and flings himself off the scaffolding. The Scotsman was quick to follow suit when he is presented with a plain haggis sandwich. And finally the Irishman opens his packed lunch and finds potato in his sandwich. 'Here I go then.' And the Irishman hurls himself off the scaffolding to follow his colleagues.
Three days later, the wives of the three men were standing together at the funeral. The Englishman's wife says, 'If only Michael had told me he couldn't stand any more beef sandwiches, this could have been avoided.' The Scotsman's wife was next to speak, 'Yes, if I didn't make him another haggis sandwich, Angus could still be with us today.' And finally the Irishman's wife states 'I don't understand, Paddy always made his own sandwiches!'
An Englishman, Scotsman And Irishman • Opuss № I