My Life So Far..

The day is long I see everybody in a blur.I think about all of the drama surrounding me.I ask the old stern teacher if I could go to the restroom.As I left down the hall I thought to myself about my friends, with their problems.I enter the restroom,splash water in my face,it's still blurry.Very blurry.I can still remember my x.Sitting in his truck,calmly talking.Laughing.Suddenly I come back to focus,looking in the mirror , I walk out in the hall and the bell rings for lunch.I grab my book and go, I didn't eat, didn't have a appetite.I see Austin the biggest jerk possible!!I look down trying to ignore him, he pulls me back.Im locked by his arms I try to walk on, but he won't let me!!

"Austin stop,let me go!"I say while tugging at his arms

"No, I wanna be with you Felicia!"

"I'm serious,go to your girlfriend and leave me alone!!"

"I'm dumping her today so please wait,and just calm down and let's talk"

I looked at him without any heart and say,

"No!!!leave me out of your life!"

He smiles,"Felicia you are my life"

I look and say,"your pathetic seriously go play your sick game with someone else you've already got what you wanted getting Jordan pregnant now go away!!"

"Felicia I don't want her"

"Exactly you just want sex!!!thats all you want,we'll news flash I'm not like that!!"I walk a couple of steps and am suddenly lifted up off the ground ,I squeal at him he doesn't listen.

"Now I can talk and explain, she's not really pregnant and at the time I loved her but I don't anymore I never loved Brittney,she was a mistake "

"Your lying you only want in my pants I know your game, so leave me out of it!!"

He stares at me and says, " Felicia I just want you every time I see you I feel like we should be together"

"We'll I don't!" Suddenly it's quiet and I don't know why ,but I guess the drama was getting to me and I bawled and he held me close as I cried.

"I wanna erase all of your pain babe"

I look up at him,and cry softly.He held me for ten minutes I decided to walk off but as I did he turned me around and kissed me I loved/hated it I pushed away then pushed forward again.....confused I walked off.

Later in the courtyard it was just me and him I look away trying to forget what happened.He smiled at me and when I turned to see if anyone was behind me he swooped me off my feet and hugged me tight I squealed and he told me about the break up,he wants me but do I want him??

Finally I say, "Okay fine Austin!"

He squeezed me tighter and carried me around screaming and hooting, I laughed and hugged him,he gave me a kiss on the head then my lips....I enjoyed it to much!!

"Okay, I'll cya tomorrow"

He kisses me one last time then gets on the bus. I watch him as he leaves and wonder what I'm getting myself into.......

The next day comes I see him and run for him,he swoops me up in his arms....and we both enjoy our morning kiss in front of the dorks aka his friends and his brother....his brother starred at me as if I was crazy..an turned away.

"How's my babe?", he asks me sweetly.

"Good,aren't you gonna put me down Hun??"I ask sweetly back.

"Nooooo never" he teases.

I laugh,and I slide down to the ground....we hold hands and laugh at his friends jokes......his brother asks to talk to me when I left Austin alone...so we did

"Felicia ,Austin is bad news and you need to talk to John"

I thought for a moment I still loved John.....a lot:/.......I walk over to him shyly

"Felicia!!im sorry give me a hug!"

Not the reaction I was expecting but I loved his hugs so I hugged him.

"I still love you Felicia and Austin needs to leave you alone"

"But John ....I'm dating him"

Suddenly everything got quiet.

"I don't want him to hurt you I love you to much for that to happen!!"

I give him a blank look and say, "I love you but we both moved on your with hailey I'm with him....it's just the way it is".

I wanted to cry,because I know he loved hailey and me and I loved him and Austin.

I heard crackling and it was....Austin.

"Hey babe come on let's go need to get away from this little boy and come here with your man".

John made a fist,but I gave him the look to stop and he did.

I said "okay hold on Hun".

I say my goodbyes to John and give him a quick hug.

Austin lifted me up and kissed me right in front of him...he was broken I could tell....

I let go and head to class were the drama starters were....I tried to ignore their childish gossip but I know I'd pop up at some point in their crap so I prepared myself....we had an old sub who told us to just talk and finish the worksheet so as I got it I heard one of them say bi.....I knew the rest of it so I just kept walking....