20 May 2012
A true story...
"Best you don't tell anyone, it'll be a secret-mine & yours. Besides, I'm sure it happens, behind other peoples doors.."
So when 5yrs old she picked me up from school Swollen lip, eye black and blue And my best friend stared and asked me, I replied 'Soon your mum will look like that too'
Of course, my best friend had her secrets Jehovah parents fuelled her fear But to show her loyalty to me She broke the mould that year
I remember the forbidden Xmas card, she pushed secretly into my hand And I cried as I knew the lengths to which she'd schemed and planned with discarded tinsel, glitter, card and borrowed glue.. As if to say " It's ok-we're just the same, me and you."
And the years passed, but no let up His drinking and temper only got worse At 9yrs old, thoughts of 'Could it be my fault? Was my birth some kind of curse?'
And the guilt from not protecting her was hard to overcome Until the night, he pushed too far and dug out his old shotgun
Loaded it in front, of his three children Terrified Beat her round the head, oblivious to pleas and cries..
Hiding my brother and sister I made the jump from window to the street below Promising them this time I'd get help- A neighbour or policeman who could overthrow...
I ran frightened down back roads and alleys To where I thought he wouldn't find me A remote phone box-made the 999 call, thinking finally Now we'll be free
But no such thing as child protection then, Just a slap on the wrist and a warning One week later, copper returns the shotgun,with a smile and a bright 'Good Morning'.....
Eventually she left him But by then the damage was done A violent legacy imprinted in the mind Of two daughters and his only son
Grown up with kids of my own now And the knowledge strikes me even more so That every child growing up Just needs their dad to be their hero
When you're programmed to love someone you hate The line is such a fine divide A lost childhood and trust that is broken Just fucks you up inside.
All rights reserved Fly10 Leigh 2012
Behind Closed Doors • Opuss № I