Little Shammy

Childhood days were a different world for me. It was as though I lived in my own little bubble, alive and excited about characters in my head and all the little details I made up to live in my perfect little world. It was a safe place to be in. Playtime took place in a mangy old basement of my house, but I dont remember being icked by the smell or the grim of it. All I remember was the makeshift swing my grandma installed for my with an old rag tied to a rope so I could spin and swing hours and hours on it. We also had a giant mirror on the basement wall where I spent most of my time practicing my dances(random, not a ballerina or anything). I swear I am not (that) vain when I say I love mirrors. I would spend hours talking to myself, practicing my princess pose wishing that one day people would comment on how pretty I was because all I got back then was constant criticisms about my hefty weight, my very dark complexion and my appearance. I have heard pretty girls having insecurity issues when all they see in the mirror staring back is an ugly beast. Funny how it turned out to be different for me back then. I was unkempt but all I saw was the girl I am today. I came a long way I suppose, and thanks to puberty, I think I look alright now. I never felt ugly on my own terms. I felt ugly because people close to me pointed it out and it was hurtful when your own mother was frustrated of you. Well bless my mum, hope that she s at least happy the way I turned out now.