14 June 2012
I'm lacking emotions now My rage has driven them out Then dissipated, leaving me Alone to face my doubt
My vision is somewhat clouded My future no longer clear I'm worried that I am losing myself It is my greatest fear
I can't take it any more Every day I'm crying All the stress is killing me Quietly, I'm dying
Each night I cannot sleep I'm afraid of all my dreams In my mind they are real But no one hears the screams
I say I have no emotions But I do have one last feeling I can sense my hollowed heart The implications send me reeling
Howling from my empty core Pouring out my pain My body is a barren wasteland A desert, no chance of rain
Opening the floodgates I allow my tears to flow Sobbing, shaking, suffering My heart is now on show
Kneeling penitently, I pray That hope is rediscovered By my softly sighing soul, And I can be recovered
Devoid of my optimism Usually so unrelenting I'm invaded with nothingness Brash and unrepenting
I'm surrounded by hypocrites But they don't understand I'm left feeling far adrift On the ocean, far from land
I fight, and try to be myself But I end up feeling drained I'm worried that my heart will crack Break from being strained
I run from here, to the edge Where waters laps by my feet I throw my worries out to sea To try to feel complete
It doesn't work, but how could it? A pebble forcefully flung Cannot repair my inner damage Or offer me a rung
A step up on the ladder To get me heading back on top Is what I'm desperately searching for Before my heart does stop
I feel my weary eyes laughing Too tired to regret They stay open all the night While I worry and fret
Agonisingly I breathe The cool condescending air It's mocking my failures too But life is never fair
I'm in a never ending spiral Forever falling free Plummeting towards the pit Of darkness, lodged in me
I'm starting to lose control I'm more than a little scared My vulnerability is under attack And I am unprepared.
I.Sparrow
Losing It. • Opuss № I