1 December 2012
I didn't know how to react
The first time a guy
Paid for my coffee.
'I'll pay for both' he said
Not thinking twice as he did so
Watching my reaction as he did so.
Then smiling to himself, happy.
Yet, I couldn't help being uneasy.
Should I be flattered? Yes?
Or does modern society
- With its pride, its rebellion
Its feminism, its individuality -
Not allow these small,
Minor acts of chivalry?
My brain said 'STOP HIM!'
My hand already wrapped
Around a tenner in my pocket,
Already unfastening my wallet,
Indignant. I could afford it.
You've met him twice, he
Doesn't know you, how dare he.
And I froze for a moment,
Stuck betwen protest and
Surrender, words that could ruin
The day, ready to slip.
All I needed was a frown,
All I needed were three words
I, will and pay. Three words to say.
But I held back, weakening
When he smiled, eyes glinting
In the dim light of the cafe,
The cashier all-knowing,
Smiled at me too, 'just let him'
She seemed to say to me
Wisdom whispering to me,
Gives him change, slowly turns away.
He carried our drinks to the
Table by the window, large
Leather sofas, ready to be occupied,
To be sat on, have endless chats on.
The glass, keeping out the wind,
But allowing the city to be viewed,
Like a silent movie, played slowly
Before us. The scenery just for us.
And we could have been there,
Could have sat there for days,
It must have been hours,
Cakes long devoured, the
Evening now ours,
Sketchbooks filled with random
Scrawls of artist and scientist
Two logics combined in pages,
Of cream coloured paper,
Now scented with the smell
Of roasted beans and treacle.
Both filled with laughter, wonder,
At the effortless sentences
That drift to and fro,
Filling the gap between us as
We sat there just looking,
Just taking in each other
Unaware of anyone else,
Ignoring the waiter
Who politely asked for plates,
Other conversations were mere
Buzzes of sounds, feeble, muted.
And my tension at the start was
Completely lost, totally gone
Him and I alone together.
No longer strangers to each other.
Ridiculous was I to have
Even thought about disheartening,
Upsetting, offending him..
How could I with that smile?
That brilliant smile that drew me in!
So I allowed him then,
To just take the lead,
Allow myself for a moment
To just feel special, believe in fate.
Let him open the door for me,
Let him carry my books for me,
...and promise a second date.
Coffee Dates • Opuss № I