@jeevuswalks

Can't Change

I'm like a chameleon, I can't change .. Always a liazrd.

@evilcaz

Crazy?

I reject the phrase crazy cat lady and prefer devoted feline groupie!.

@wolflore

...walks In To A Bar

A man walks in to a bar with a giraffe. He orders one pint for himself and ten for the giraffe. The giraffe downs his pints really quickly and passes out.

@overskill

Squirrel In A Bar

A squirrel walks into a bar. What's it say. Nothing. It's a squirrel..

@overskill

Motorway In A Bar

A motorway walks into a bar and orders a drink. It is talking to the barman when a tiny strip of tarmac walks into the bar and starts growling. The motorway hides in a corner.

@AdamClarke

What you call dog with no legs. Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come..

@lukeni

Duckface

I saw some ducks in the park looking at their reflection in the water. I'm pretty sure they were practicing their teenage slut face..

@joey2000x

Pandas!

Philosophical q and a of the day - Q. Why are pandas black and white. A.They were all white until a whole clan (?) was inbolved in a freak accident involving a biro factory..