1 May 2012
You know who you are.
And overall what I'm trying to say is that I hate you.
I hate that you always come back and you stay and then you leave after nothing is going on in my life. Then you come back again as soon as things get interesting. Am I just clay for you to manipulate?
You prevent me from breathing. The air that I need is blocked and I try hard to fulfill my lungs desire. But even when I do, each breath is short and unsatisfying and I clutch onto the material of my shirt over my chest in my struggle.
You shut my ears from listening. From hearing as well as I could be. Everything sounds enclosed and far and they feel the need to just burst so I can finally listen to everyone's words. But they can't. At least. Not as well as before.
You have silenced me. But I can still talk, but it's hard and it can hurt my throat so much to the point where I just can't and everyone can barely understand what I have to say. So why even bother talking? It's hard for me to right now and it pains me. So why try?
You have made me impatient and needy all the time. I can never last five minutes without giving you your desired reaction or a reaction from within itself and I always have to ask for favors and wants from others who do not deserve the trouble. I always need a box of tissues at arms reach because of it and it hurts every time I use those soft, white sheets of comfort, but I'm tired of using up all my boxes to only buy some more. It's like a drug and you keep tempting me to take it. You ask too much from me. You ask too much of me.
You make my head hurt. It throbs constantly and sleeping is only a temporary solitude. It goes away sure, but the dull ache is there before growing into the hurt again. Then I sleep again because,
You make me tired. You took so much of my will. So much of my energy. All I can do is sleep and dream of nothing. But how can I sleep, how can I have that temporary solitude when I cannot breathe? And there's the tissues right at my side. Maybe they can help. And they do help. But only for a moment before I struggle again. And again.
Well. You've been here for a while now. It's almost time for you to go, right? And you'll come back as usual. But for now, you'll be leaving again. Because nothing is going on and like I said. You've been here for a while.
So I'll say it again. You know who you are. And overall what I'm trying to say is that I hate you.
And I hate getting sick.
I hate you common cold.
(PS. Yes this whole thing was about my cold xD )
You're A Sickness • Opuss № I