5 June 2012
My Hundredth Opuss For you...
Each day when we wake up, we think of how this day may be... Maybe about someone we care for or...someone we miss. Or maybe...miss someone you've never met like I have. There is this girl I've never met, only seen and dreamt of. She is in a Japanese comic ( manga ) , with beautiful golden-brown hair, sometimes golden sometimes brown depending on the light, thin and an angel. She comes in the manga Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles, which is one that remade me. And this girl, is who I hope to meet, when everything must do...is done. Her name...is Sakura...meaning the cherry blossoms that grow there, maybe on the edge of a lake...
I dream of drifting, Slowly shifting on a lake bright. It feels like a cup sitting of the top of the world, out of sight.
The oars are floating, on some water behind. They're no more, for all they trust they had born, the little promises they had sworn. I still wouldn't cry, wouldn't mourn.
Because in the water ahead, lies a reflection of something more in life, unsaid. For all along, in my life I sped, never stopping, living too much of "life" instead.
In that reflection I say the cherry blossom trees, beguiling me with their silent breath of secrets. Sakura, I've seen you, and I feel you nearby me , You seem to disappear among the petals, Though my gaze never left your flowery smile.
When I wake up, somedays I have cried... Because all of the unsaid doubts in myself and the regrets overwhelm me. All the things I cannot do, all the things I can but wish I couldn't , all the things I haven't done and everything I have but wish I hadn't. I cry, and then all that flows through me is grief. Because I have lost everyone dearest to me; Attitude, Cool, Secrecy, Mystery, Love to-be... And because when the day goes on, I don't regret any of it, because I hope that the reason I lost them, was because there is something which I have to do, which only I can do , and for which I am moulded to be. I hope and beg and pray too sometimes, and because each time I pray challenging God, if he or she exists to grant my plea, it comes true. I pray those few times, now increasing, just staring upwards and saying, "I don't care who you are. I've hoped and lived on my entire life and pain, just believing that when it is all done, I will meet her. So you better not rat me out or you will have this mad dog on your heels. I know you can't care less about how I feel, but guess what! You need to, to prove you're real!"
Overseas from coast to coast, To where I find my fields green. I will see my love useen, I will find, my Sakura, not my Queen, But my Princess, serene.
She will be like no one ever, and heads will turn to see her shiver. But I'll be there already, her soldier, and sole endeavour... I swear I'll protect , through space and forever.
One day, I just couldn't bear it anymore... Usually people do things or search for something after a sign or anything that nudges them to it... But here I am hoping in nothing, desperately searching for that sign with nothing with me. I spent that day in a haze, like a stone in time watching everyone and everything pass while I just stood...watching... But that night, there was a realization. I will do it, because it is something I have to do. Because it is us, who control space and time and destiny. It is the characters, who fight. And being the lazy me, I will show everyone the true definition of possible. Laugh at God and Death and dance to a beat while they stand, their mouths hanging open in surprise. And I will get my Sakura someday, because of th same reason the sea and a cave nearby always keep touching, for the same reason people seas apart find each other while having nothing in common and for the same reason that doubt and destiny, keep doing their double deal each day. The reason that nature, will make way for them to meet, in the power of they're choices and actions.
Proof is unavailable so listen to music sweet. Such music as will love you sweet, and with truth go and compete.
And when the night of so arrives, the stars will shine bright so the reality thrives. Clouds part to show us dark, dawn waiting a bit for us to rise and shine.
When all is done, you will be mine, once I find each memory you lost in time. Till then when you sleep I will hold your hand, for that's when I can.
When you wake you feel loved and safe, for it's when we first feel love. Your hand will be warm and still there you lay, I walk in, you shining like everyday. So smile once more, and make my day.
Together we will travel across time and dimensions, where I won't stop, Till I find your memories sweet and bitter. We can travel forever, Taking just a day each day... Facing the woods, And building a way.
Those few days of innocent beauty, Will glow unto my heart forever. When I lay dying on cold floor under warm sun, It's that which lights my way.
So be with me, Find me as I search for you. Keep a weather eye on that horizion, For someday our dreams will be true.
And some night, when we've done it all, We'll sit watching the lake together. We'll know our hearts without seeing them, When our eyes close we'll smile, knowing we went through all of 'em. And in my arms or me in yours, We'll smile, my love feeling something meant for us to feel, knowing we were right, In chosing to experiment living, And find out...the dawn coming.. All while, we were still out there in hell...smiling.
-Srivatsan
---------------
For you Sakura....I'll die , cry, try a hundred times. I do not know you, but my heart is somewhere with yours...as yours is with mine's. I'll find you someday, where the skies are blue and Death is sober. For you , Sakura...a thousand times over.
Sakura • Opuss № I