19 July 2012
Ok this actually happened, it occurred right as I'm writing this out!
First things you need to know about this tale is there was no animal cruelty involved actually it was the opposite, second of all my cousin and I are currently in a cottage in Northumberland. I'm 16, she's nearly there, so we're supposed to be more than capable looking after ourselves and being sensible...
Today was supposed to be a good day, as we had been granted one of those rare moments when we could have a lay in while parents have gone out.
We got up bout 10:30, came in to the kitchen and ate breakfast. Till I saw the chicken! Brilliantly i thought a great idea was to let said chicken in... My cousin agreed and encouraged the idea in her way by saying "aww little chicken" The chicken was not little in the slightest! Calling to it like a cat said chicken walked in, then walked out to the step. I thought good idea was to give some Jacobs crackers as a snack...my cousin later had same idea with another cracker! There is now crushed cracker bits all on the outside step as that ungrateful bastard of said chicken did not eat it all!
What made worse was when said chicken came in again we saw a quite a big surprise left on a doormat for us! We chased said chicken outside locking it outside and leaving it with crushed crackers.
We panicked thinking oh shit what do we do, I would like to remind you this was not our house and our cottage was connected to there B and B/home.
We cleaned up a little bit and picked up the doormat with said chickens, chicken shit and placed in there laundry room with a piece of kitchen roll on it in plain site for said chickens owners.
They are not in at the moment so we have no idea what will happen to said chickens, chicken shit!
The only evidence left of what had occurred today is crushed crackers on a door step that that ungrateful bastard of said chicken did not finish and the chicken shitted mat left in the laundry room.
©minxyMolly
Oh Chicken Shit! • Opuss № I