4 December 2012
Part 3 - Autumn
I was vaguely aware of the uncomfortable lumps in the ragged old hospital chair as I dozed in the late autumn sunshine. The light felt warm and comforting on my cheeks, taking me away from this dreary place back to the warmth of summer.
The air grew colder with the crisp fingers of winter advancing forward. Soon I would have to dig out my favourite old purple scarf and brave the snows. But for now, all seemed calm. And time drifted like the golden leaves from the slumbering, naked trees.
I felt someone looking at me, making my eyes flicker open and leave the autumnal daydream behind.
"Nice nap?" Jack smiled from the bed.
I smiled, knowing he must have been watching me all the while.
"I thought I was the one meant to be looking after you?" I tease.
"I know, sleeping on the job," He tutted, "you slacker!"
I laughed and in that moment everything seemed alright again.
---
A doctor walked into the room, clipboard in hand, face looking tired and grey. His eyes flicked between us, "The extent of effected tissue is much greater than we would like. I'm afraid the best course of action would be removal of parts of your bowel."
Jack swallowed, visibly, "Which parts?"
"Your large colon, as this is most severely affected, but a surgeon will discuss the details with you." The doctor said matter-of-factly. "We will try you on a new medication to see if the effects on your other organs can be reversed."
Jack seemed to deflate, melting down into the chalky pillows.
"And what if the medication doesn't work on the rest...?" I heard my voice ask.
"If that happens to be the case, further options will be explored."
The silence felt heavy in the air of the small room. The doctor left.
"Are you ok?" I whisper, crawling into bed beside him, picking myself around all the tubes and tape.
His face was pale. Frightened, ice-blue eyes turned to mine, "Will you still love me, even if I end up as half a man?"
"You're not going to be half a man, Jack," I sighed, at loss of what I say. The disease was everywhere, his bowel, kidneys, liver, bladder, skin, even his penis...
A hand brushed something warm and wet from my cheek, "shhhh, it's ok... I'll be ok." He murmured.
"I don't want to lose you,"
"I'm not going anywhere... I just might be shedding a few bits."
Choices in Love • Opuss № I