29 June 2012
The rest of the honeymoon flew by in a blur of colour, sounds and heat. We flew home a week later, Adam and I were still trying for a baby, but weeks were turning to months and I was starting to worry.
'Adam' I asked as he walked out of the shower, towel wrapped round his waist and hair dripping. 'I think I should visit the doctors.' I said abruptly. 'ok...why do feel sick.' his eyes glimmered with hope. 'no... I'm worried Adam, getting pregnant should not be this hard, we are doing everything right, I just want a second opinion that's all.' I mumbled. We hadn't told anyone we were trying, we wanted it to be a surprise for them when it happened, but neither of us had anticipated that it would take so long. 'ok, do you want me to call the clinic.' Adam asked sounding worried, 'yes please.' I smiled weakly, rubbing my stomach absent mindedly. We both sat nervously in the waiting room, Adam reached over and took my hand, I smiled at him but I could tell that the smile didn't quite reach my eyes. 'Abby' a young nurse called, we both stood up 'Dr Harris will see you now.' she lead us through a small corridor that smelt of disinfectant and bleach. We walked in and were greeted by a smiling middle aged man. 'please take a seat.' he beckoned me to sit on the bed and for Adam to sit on the chair. 'so what seems to be the problem.' he smiled. 'well you see, we've been trying for a baby for about four months and we haven't had any luck, I just wanted to check that there wasn't any health problems.' I said quickly. He nodded, his demeanor becoming more serious as I spoke. 'ok, well before we run any tests has anything happened to you that may affect your ability to conceive.' he asked. I began to shake my head, when Adam interject 'yes...yes we didn't think of it of it before, Abby was hit repeatedly in her stomach you don't think that could...' he trailed off looking pained, even though I told him repeatedly that there was nothing he could have done to stop what happened, I know that deep down he blames himself for not protecting me. 'it could be a cause, but it is highly unlikely, if our other tests come back negative we will run an ultra sound to see if there's any damage to that area.' he turned to look at me, 'are there any cases in your family of people being unable to conceive.' my hands flew to my mouth and my eyes filled with tears, I ran out of the room, I ran down the corridor and sank to floor. A sob escaped from my throat, which was followed by more until I was crying hysterically. I heard feet thundering down the hall. 'Abby what's wrong...what happened.' I choked and said 'Adam its my mum...she couldn't have any more children after she had me.'
©
Love And War Chpt.46 • Opuss № I