31 May 2012
She knew it was wrong the day she had quit the force. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't work there anymore. Too many painful memories. Of capture. Of her dead partner. Of all those deaths. If only they had seen the signs earlier. Maybe they could have stopped it.
She knew it was wrong when she walked slowly up her stairwell. Pictures on the wall of memories long gone. Of happier times. Times when she actually felt human, instead of a shell.
She knew it was wrong and that no one would ever understand. But she had been alone in this world for too long. She couldn't take being alone any longer. It made her want to scream out in pain.
She knew it was wrong as she walked into her bedroom. Bed looking like it hadn't been slept in. Clothes neatly stacked. The only thing out of place was an empty bottle of Vodka on her night stand. It came to something when she couldn't sleep without a drink in her.
She knew it was wrong when she took it out of her draw. Morris held it up to her face. Looking it over. Watching it almost shine in the light. The reflections dancing.
She knew it was wrong walking to her bathroom. The carpet feeling soft under her bare skin. Her cat curled up on the floor beside the door. She reached down and stroked it gently.
She knew it was wrong as she opened the door. The blue walls shining in the sun light coming through the window. She sat slowly down on the toilet with a heavy sigh.
She knew it was as she unwrapped it. Tossing the plastic away into the bin beside her.
She knew it was wrong as she placed it between her legs. Catching it mid-flow. Removing it quickly, making sure not to touch it with her bare hands. Have hoping for one thing, half hoping for another.
She knew it was wrong as she flushed, pulling back up her knickers and jeans. Her face looking sad and pale. The wait almost killing her. Watching her watch. Time seeming to stand still.
She knew it was wrong as she picked it up. Almost daring not to look. But there it was a blue line had appeared. It seemed she wouldn't be alone much longer.
She knew it was wrong as she tossed it in the bin. Tears welling in her eyes. From disgust or delight she wasn't sure.
She knew it was wrong as she rubbed her belly. Inside her something was growing. From a devil seed.
She knew it was wrong, but she seemed to feel her loneliness slowly ebbing away.
She knew it was wrong, but inside her was growing Charlie Morris-Crippen.
Stan: Epilogue • Opuss № I