22 April 2012
Chapter 1: Beginning (Part 3)
At first, all I could only see how selfish Denny was being. I had no care or thought for her happiness.
Fourteen years she had waited for the perfect man and all I saw was fourteen years of friendship being snatched away from us.
Jace is everything to me and now he will be living on the other side of town.
Denny assures me, I am welcome to visit them anytime, and Jace can visit Mum and me, but we both know it won't be the same as simply popping next door. Sure we can stay in touch online or by phone but nothing beats hanging out together twenty four-seven. There was also the fact that after years of doing everything together, we would be starting the upper years of high school separately. For the first time ever we would have to make our own way to Priory High School, alone, coming in from different directions. But right now the short picket fence was all that parted us from what was happening. It acted like a protective shield. For months, I hadn't dared think about the move, as if, by not thinking about it, it wouldn’t happen. But now I glanced over to Jace’s house and saw the removal men carrying a cardboard box into the lorry. Scribbled on one side was “Jace's Room” in black marker pen. I shut my eyes tightly to push back the image of his things being taken away from me.
Denny was annoyed that Jace and I weren’t helping to box up his things but our faces had been a picture of misery for days now. Today was no different, except Jace’s expression was thicker, more definite. Despite Denny's scowl, she didn’t challenge us for fear of it being the last straw that would finally break Jace down. He hadn't cried as far as I knew but even if he had he wouldn't tell anyone. Jace said only pansies cry. Still, it was no secret; he didn't want to move any more than I wanted him to go. He said he could live anywhere in the world, so long as I was in the house next door.
With mum’s help, I had made him a bracelet as a goodbye gift and given it to him this morning. He was wearing it around his wrist. Fourteen silver beads to represent each year of our friendship were alternating with little wooden blue beads – his favourite colour. When I gave him the gift, it felt like a goodbye.
Since I had given it to him, we hadn't said a word. I’d intended to tell him that I’d chosen blue, not because it was his favourite colour but because it was the colour of friendship; mum and I had soaked it in white wine and crushed basil leaves as she said this would encourage him to visit more often. Now, those facts seemed pointless and the words remained unspoken. We sat side by side, our knees gently touching. We were quite content like that.
There was no need to make small talk, but our silence had made the morning drag on. I imagined this must be how a child might feel during its parents’ divorce. I felt powerless as the dreaded moment of separation drew nearer.
Leading up to this point in time, I had tried to imagine how I would say good bye but now my throat was dry and I couldn’t find the right words.
My thoughts were interrupted by the loud clang of the lorry door slamming shut. The sound rang with injustice like a judge’s gavel on a silent court room.
Desperately I flung my arms around Jace. I wasn't ready to let him go. I breathed in his smell, a mix of boy and the great outdoors. It brought back memories of splashing in puddles in wellies, climbing up trees and scrapping our knees, racing along the seafront and camping in the backyard sharing spooky tales. My life with Jace, up until this moment, flooded my mind. All those memories that had made me blissfully happy now caused an aching hollowness in my heart. It now felt so final. I began to choke and the tears ran down my cheeks. I buried my face into Jace’s shoulder so no-one could see, but I couldn't mask the loud sobs as they shook my body. I had held them back for too long and now my tears crashed out in sharp, sudden rolls. Jace held me close and rubbed my back.
“Don't cry, Freckles, you'll set me off!” he whispered into my ear. As I calmed, Jace gently pried me away from his body and brushed the tears from my cheeks with his thumb.
His eyes were red. “I'm sorry.” I croaked, knowing he would never want me to see him cry.
Denny lent over the fence, “Come on you two, it’s not like you'll never see each other again.” In her hands was the basil plant and new broom that mum had given her as a house warming present. Some people might think them strange gifts, but not if you knew my mum.
Drift 1.3 Beginning • Opuss № I