28 April 2012
I'm starting a new Egyptian based story. I got my inspiration from The Kane Chronicles by Rick Riordan so you might see some similarities. All criticism/ideas welcome. Here goes.
Cairo, Egypt. The first Nome.
Akhom ran. Faster than he had ever ran before. His heart beating so fast he felt as if it would burst from his chest. He weaved through the busy market streets of Cairo, dodging traders and street performers. Finally, he came to a stop at a run-down building, with "Tours of the Pyramids." written hastily on a cardboard sign out front. He walked inside, panting heavily from the run. The building was just a run-down inside, a little less hot than outside, a worn desk in one corner, crates for chairs and faded advertisements hanging on the walls. A short stout old man sat at the desk, read the daily paper. Akhom walked up to him. "Tours are cancelled for today." he muttered, still reading his paper. "Please sir. Can you at least give me a ride out to the Sphinx?. I'll pay you double." The old man sighed and folded his news paper in half. Business was bad, and he needed the money. "Fine. Get into the bus." Akhom smiled gratefully, and ran outside to the tiny, dust covered tour bus.
Ai sat at the base of the Sphinx. Were was Akhom?.. He usually wasn't this late. She sighed and brushed sand from her hair.The most important day of their training and he was late. Typical. She picked up the black work bag beside her and gripped the handle tightly.
Suddenly, she saw the outline of a dirty tour bus trundling down the sandy path towards the Sphinx. Before it could stopped, Akhom came jumped clumsily out, shut the door and ran across the sand towards Ai. "Sorry." He gasped, doubling over. "I got delayed at the airport. They nearly took my wand from me. I had to place an illusion on them." Ai glared at him. "There's no time for apologies now. We're almost a hour late for training, thanks to you." She flicked her straight, black hair out of her face and snatched her bag up from the sand. Together they walked around to the back of the Sphinx. "Take out your wand." Ai ordered. Akhom threw his hand into his black work bag, identical to Ai's, and took out a stick of curved white ivory. Together they traced the hieroglyphs for the word Open on the wall. The hieroglyphs suddenly started glowing a faint blue colour. The wall shook, and and huge stone blocks fell out of place, Revealing a dark, narrow passage. Blue hieroglyphs came to view above the passage entrance. They read, "House of Life, First Nome." Ai and Akhom walked in together. The wall rebuilding itself quickly after them.
The House Of Life - 1 • Opuss № I