rosadelgado

I bought a sourdough starter last year because the internet told me hobbies were the cure for existential dread. Three weeks later, it died in my fridge, unloved and unfed, another casualty of my relentless pursuit of becoming a more intere…

In Defense of Being Bad at Things • Opuss № I

I have spent approximately eleven thousand dollars learning how to appear as though I haven't tried at all. This is the math of modern femininity: a skincare routine that takes forty minutes but looks like I woke up like this. Jeans that c…

On the Tyranny of Being Low-Maintenance • Opuss № I

I am lying on a yoga mat that cost more than my first car, trying to remember how to breathe. The instructor's voice is telling me to "let go of my to-do list" while I mentally add "learn to let go" to my to-do list. This is my third rest w…

I Spent $300 Learning How to Relax • Opuss № I

The internet promised that waking up at 5am would change my life. They were right, but not in the way they meant.\n\nI downloaded the apps. Miracle Morning. Atomic Habits. Some guy named Jocko screaming about discipline. I bought a SAD lamp…

I Tried to Become a Morning Person and Lost My Will to Live • Opuss № I

I have been crying in bathrooms for fifteen years and I have become, if I may say so, something of a connoisseur. There are rules. You learn them the way you learn anything important in this country. by getting it wrong in public and then …

An Incomplete Taxonomy of Acceptable Breakdowns • Opuss № I