2 May 2012
Dear Someone, You know how some people say, that when you know you've found the person that you'll be absolutely in love with for the rest of your life, you feel something inside you click? I am so scared of losing you. I'm scares because, after all the pain I went through in a few of my relationships, and that moment last spring break... I thought that I was never gonna get it right. Then I took a chance and told you that I liked you. I was nervous to do so. Then, an even bigger risk when I told you that I was in love with you. I was petrified. When we first kissed, I thought that I was going to die right then and there because of how fast my heart was beating. I thought it would explode. It felt as though time and space froze completely. The whole world dropped around me. And when we kissed again, that same day, there it was. The click. The click that smacks you in the face and says, "Oh. There you are." That was when I realized that you were what I had been looking for for so long. You know how bad the butterflies are when you first realize how much you love someone? Then how much stronger the butterflies get when you remember, that person loves you back just as much? I get that feeling every single time. Every. Single. Time. Every single time your hand is in mine. Every single time I see you smile. Every single time I look into those gorgeous eyes of yours. Every time you hug me. Every single time your hand accidentally brushes against mine. Every single time your name lights my phone. Every single time I look at you. You are so beautiful to me. I've never been in a relationship and felt monster butterflies the whole time we're together. Usually, the feeling lasts the first week or so, then becomes natural to me. With you, it's always there. Always. I don't want to lose the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'm scared of feeling those monster butterflies, but knowing that you aren't mine anymore. I'm scared because, when you love someone how I love you, you're apart of each other. Like there's this invisible tether that's holding you together. And when you pull on that tether, you know that there's someone on the other side waiting for you. I'm scared of pulling on that tether, and feeling nothing. No one waiting on the other side. Finding that I'm alone, and left falling. Falling into nothingness.
Love & Rockets, Shane
Dear Someone [part 2] • Opuss № I