stormieskies
Preparing to thrash my little bro and his mates at laser tag! Xxxx
I betted on Sunnyhillboy to win! Xxx
Anyone betting on the Grand National? What horse? I'm betting on According to Pete and Sunnyhillboy :-) xxx
"After being chased by the police, I crawled out of the bramble bush I'd been hiding in and all the way home. Getting into bed with my girlfriend, I told her I'd had an epiphany. She told me not to take that drug, it's bad for my heart"- Ba…
My 10 year old bro just asked me what Playboy was and I told him it was a group of girls who dressed like sluts to please men He then asked me "So, do they wear, like, really small tight bikinis?" Total lolage. Xxx
First time is funny. Second is irritating. Third... Just don't. Xxxx
You know Think Of Me from Phantom of the Opera... Is it a ballad? Xxx
Love is like a game of chess; you want to win, you have to make your move..... Xxx
When I saw you, I was afraid to meet you, When I met you, I was afraid to know you, When I knew you, I was afraid to love you, Now I love you, I'm afraid to lose you... Xxxx
I just saw Albus Dumbledore on Lord of the Rings! Xxxx
My brother (3 years younger) just beat me at chess in front of my parents. Ive been playing for longer, and I could have checkmated him a few moves before. No one knows how awful I feel right now.
Teacher: Harry, why are you always so dirty! Harry: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are!
Teacher: Sam, find America on the map. Sam: *points* here. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who discovered America? Class: Sam.
That guy in the Thames? You know, the guy who completely RUINED the Oxford-Cambridge boat race? Dick. X
I DON'T HAVE TWITTER! IM NOT A TWIT! xxxx
The girl leant against the wall, graffiti can in hand, staring lazily up at the sky. It was a dark, murky brown, as normal. It had been 15 years since anybody had seen the creamy, natural blue. Not since 2012. That cold, frost bitten day in…
"I dream of a better tomorrow, when chickens can cross the road, and not have their motives questioned!" xxx
God gave us two eyes to see, Two ears to hear, Two hands to hold, But why only one heart? Because he wants us to find the other one.... Xxx