27 May 2012
Thankyou @Fly10
My Family tree
Great Grandfather Died last day at the battle of the Somme
Grandfather Ran a hotel for many years, only later on i found out it was brothel he was running. He was in prison the day my parents were married for living off e-moral earnings.He supported Oswald Mosley during the second WW by becoming a Brown Shirt. Also had his own taxi business, but was burnt out. In later years my grandfather was bedded by his daughter, (her mother was a prostitute)This went on till he died. And when he died everything was left to her, to say my father was gutted would be an understatement, he was hoping to get loads of money.
Uncle Also ran a hotel for many years, with his boyfriend. Whom he met while serving in the Army. They retired from the hotel, and brought themselves a wee house, my uncle died of a massive heart attack on the kitchen floor, and the boyfriend, who was bed bound died sometime later. They were well off, but family went and raided the place.
Father The night i was born my father was out celebrating with some prostitutes. As soon as i became old enough i took over from my mother as the whipping post. I took so many beatings. I was thrown over a first floor balcony, beaten with a ten pin bowling skittle (He was the under manager at a ten pin place) Whipped for an hour, 5 min on 5 min off. No wonder i was always running away from home. He also had sex with my sister. He met my stepmother who had 4 kids of her own, moved them in and kicked my mother out. I did manage to escape when i was 15.5 years old. I joined the army as a boy soldier, i stayed in the Army for 26.5 years. I had the snip as soon as was able, i never wanted to put my kids through what i went through. I have my father temper, i don't think i ever managed to control it, i just avoid situations and confrontations. I haven't lost in years and i hope i never will.
Mother We never really got on, But when i had leave form the Army i would pop in and say hi, the same to my sister and brother, as i thought this was the right thing to do, spend a few hours and bugger off. I always hated myself for being weak for visiting them. When my second marriage broke up I drifted home. Things with my mother had not improved. She kept saying to me over the years that she would leave me £50 in her will, well i was always happy with that. A couple of years ago i was told that she had changed her mind and that £50.000 was coming my way.I went around and told her that its too late for her to be nice to me, and my love was not for sale at any price, she can keep her money and that i never wanted to see her again.None of her grandkids go and see her, and neither my brother or sister like her they are just holding out for the money. I don.t see my sister either as i have banished her. My brother i admire as he my only be a bin man but he has taught himself so much about DIY he does everything in the house, me i'm chuffed if in can changed a plug. My mother is helping my brother, by paying for stuff for him to do up his house. I did ask him about that saying "he had no pride" He shrugged his shoulders and said "If she is happy to do it, why should i stop her". My brother and sister are both younger than me
Woody has told me a few times that i'm not right in the head, and she has said the same about my brother. But i look at things in a stranger way, I survived my childhood, but i carry many battle scars. When i was a kid i had no heros to look up too, I was wetting the bed till i was 14, shy, afraid and living in fear. Then i join the Army, it has made me the person I am today, for better, for worse only time will tell.
Only after reading @Fly10 post Behind Closed Doors, that all these memories came flooding back to me. I don't know if i'm doing the right thing, sharing all of this with you guys, but this IS the first time that i have put all of this down on paper and shared my life with the world. I'm more reserved
Behind Closed Doors, My Version • Opuss № I