29 July 2012
Dear diary,
Master takes me for a walk today. I use my super-sensy powers to sniff out a
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Master uses me to distract nasty men, distracting nasty men is what I do. I like distracting nasty men, especially when when they give me biscuits. Master uses this time to 'kick their asses'. I don't know why master does this, why not just be a friendly human and sniff it instead? The nasty men always call me something like 'Bollocks' or 'Oh damn' or 'I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kid'. I do not know why as I like the name Colin much bigger than that.
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Master buys me a cape. I do not like cape, it hurts my collar. I eat it, but it doesn't taste good.
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Diary Of A Superhero's Pet • Opuss № I