17 May 2012
Once upon a munchkin, in a land not far from here, there lived a goblin called Gilbert, who was a goblin musketeer.
He lived deep in a forest, where the pixies dare not go. A place so deep and dense and thick, never touched by rain or snow.
He was considered to be a brave goblin, and he guarded that dark, scary place, with a goblin deadeye musket, and a tiny bottle of Mace.
He didn't know what he was guarding, to be honest, he didn't care, for he was a very brave goblin, besides, there was nobody there.
He would get up in the evening, then he'd stand there looking brave, and when he thought it was tea time, he'd eat his dinner in a cave.
So Gilbert's life was simple, and although it wasn't fun, somebody had to do it, and he was the bravest one.
Now that was all about to change, one dark and gloomy night, whilst Gilbert stood there looking brave, he saw a glowing light.
At first Gilbert stood and watched it, as it faded then it glowed, like it was unsure what it wanted to do, either explode or implode.
Gilbert came to a conclusion, that it must be a Wisp. ( A sort of glowing fairy thing, that's rumoured to exist).
The wisp kept glowing and fading, and the hour was getting late, Gilbert decided it was time, he should investigate.
He put powder in his musket, this was from ground beetle shell, mixed up with some conker sap, and flammable as hell.
Then a tiny little bullet, (this was just a seed), and made his way towards the Wisp. He was very brave indeed.
But as Gilbert got closer, the Wisp began to smell, he thought that it must be on fire, co's there was lots of smoke as well.
Gilbert took aim with his musket, though through the smoke he could barely see. The Wisp was certainly on fire, he must end it's misery.
The powder then ignited, the little seed shot out, the Wisp it coughed and spluttered, but it didn't fizzle out.
That had been what he'd expected, he thought it would kind of pop! He thought it would simply cease to be, but it didn't even stop!
It coughed and spluttered, faded, glowed, and still it smoked and smelt, and Gilbert, (who was stood downwind), had a feeling he'd never felt.
He suddenly felt woozy, and kind of hungry too, as he looked at his powder and musket, and wasn't sure what to do.
He'd forgotten how to use it, he'd forgotten what it was! Gilbert had a little giggle, and dropped his powder on the moss.
Gilbert laid back on a fern then, put his musket on the ground, and opened up a woodlouse. (a passing delicacy he'd found.)
No longer was he feeling brave, in fact he felt quite calm. The Wisp was minding it's own business, and not doing any harm.
Gilbert didn't seem to mind the smoke, and he kind of liked the smell, and everything he thought about just made him laugh as well.
(Now this is rare for Goblins, as their humour is quite dark, and while they are often happy, they lack that funny spark.)
The Wisp was there till' morning, but Gilbert was well asleep, and there was no one there to wake him, in the forest, dense and deep.
He could of slept for hours, perhaps he slept for days, but the Wisp became his best friend, and they rarely parted ways.
Gilbert never introduced himself, as he thought he'd better not, just in case the Wisp remembered, the time that it got shot.
The Goblin, The Wisp & The Alchemists Kush • Opuss № I