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Story (This Is The Proper Version) Part 1 *EDIT*

Ok. Had one person comment on it so I will try and write the first part. It may take a while.

The girl slowly started to open her eyes. She was aware of a dull throbbing pain at the back of her head. She tried to call out, to scream, but no sound came. She took a moment to look around. She was in a cold, dark room with only a tiny amount of sunlight streaming through a small window up in the corner.She tried to raise her head to get a better look, but her body disobeyed. She desperately tried to remember something, anything, but all she could recall was that her name was Helena, and that she should be at her house party. She tried again to raise her head, and this time she succeeded. Next she tried to get to her feet, but quickly discovered that her feet were being held to the ground, as were her hands. She desperately tried to break free, but to no avail. As if out of nowhere, a bright white light came on above her and flooded the small room with a starch white glow. From behind her, she heard a man say,
"night night, princess". 'That voice sounds familiar...' she thought. All of a sudden, she realised that it was the voice of her kidnapper. But before she had a chance to cry out, or even turn to face him, something sharp jabbed her neck and once more, she slumped to the floor.

part 2 coming soon

Codenameverity

@Codenameverity

Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to the shore.

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Comments & Feedback (5)

It's a good start, perhaps try to build the intro up a bit, before she gets snatched. or just start from the room again and bring flashbacks of who she is into the story.(-: thanks for carrying it on (-:

Haha no probs! May edit it later! :-)

@Stablish edited it. Opinions?

I really like it, the feel of suspense is good. Can't wait to find out how she got there and how she will get out. Can't wait for more. (-:

Heheh... Working on it!!

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