Twas the night before Christmas and all down my street
Could be heard creepy moaning and shuffling of feet.
Christmas is usually full of joy and cheer,
But something sinister was occurring this year.
I had been nestled all warm in my bed,
When I heard someone screaming "Here come the undead!"
I shot to the window, to see if it were true,
And when I looked out I knew not what to do!
A sleigh and eight reindeer were parked on the snow,
But surrounded by corpses, they had nowhere to go,
The shambling zombies closed in for the kill,
Santa was not saved by his festive goodwill.
Oh poor Father Christmas, he wasn't so quick,
Killed by a hoard, overwhelming and thick.
The new fallen snow was splattered with red,
Father Christmas reduced to a dismembered head!
Dasher was dead, torn apart too was Vixen,
A daring escape attempt made by Donner and Blitzen,
They ran at the zombies and tried to take flight,
But eaten they were, though they put up a fight.
Then noises I heard from inside my home,
A groaning and moaning; I wasn't alone.
Downstairs I tiptoed, I peeked round the tree,
My heart filled with fear at what I might see.
There, dressed in red, a zombie did lurk,
He shambled towards me with a stutter and jerk,
The creature was rotting, a right dripping mess,
Fear gripped my heart and I must confess
I tried to escape, but the creature was quick,
Even though he was dressed as a zombie St. Nick,
He chased me around, upended the tree,
Knocked down the stockings before cornering me.
I picked up a large gift, all wrapped up and ready,
And used it as a weapon to smash the things head in.
But noise of the kill just attracted more foes,
Adding ever more to my Xmas eve woes!
They smashed at the windows and tried to get in,
Screeching and wailing, a terrible din,
I thought I was done for, that the end was nigh,
When something by the fireplace caught my eye.
Above the mantle a shotgun did hang,
Just incase upon an intruder I sprang,
I took it and loaded, ready for the kill,
Of my innards the zombies would not get their fill!
My house was surrounded by undead, left and right,
But I aimed and I fired, their heads in my sight,
These creatures would not beat me, I'd put up a fight:
"Merry Christmas," I yelled "and to all a good night."
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