18 August 2012
"Nuts for sale, nuts for sale.... Who will buy my nuts for sale". Said the old woman sat in her box of cardboard. She was draped in a newspaper from the blitz. Her hair resembling spaghetti that was past it's sell by date. Her face like a bulldog chewing on a wasp. Her hands like a rusted bicycle wheel spoke. She smelt like a bottle of turps that hadn't been opened since 1346. It was a pathetic sight. She looked like a tramp who had been given a degree in trampiness by the University of Hull.
But no one replied. For they all had nuts.
She thought to herself. "This is no good they all have nuts. Tomorrow I shall sell parrots for there are not enough pirates in this world".
And so she did. She sold many a parrot. Legend says that that same old haggard woman emigrated to Africa and now sells Parrots to children of Sierra Leone, who before her arrival were deprived of parrots.
And thus the African piracy trade was born.
Parrots Of Sierra Leone • Opuss № I