18 April 2012
DOG: the sofa cushions are ganging up on me.
No they're not.
DOG: Sorry, are you here? Don't patronise me. I know when I'm being attacked.
Yeah alright. Calm down.
DOG: it's because I had sex with one of them
Then you deserve it.
You shouldn't even be on the sofa. GET DOWN NOW
DOG: I'm all sprawled out on it... Draw me like one of your French girls, jack
Dickhead.
Texts From My Dog 20 • Opuss № I